Around the world, it is likely that more adults will work from home, and more children will study from home, as computer technology becomes cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this will be a positive or negative development.

#world #adults #work #home #children #study #computer #technology #development

Owing to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technological advancement, many kinds of

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

can be done without having to be at the office.

Similarly

, due to the fact that technology becomes less expensive, students can

also

study at their house. From my point of view, there are both advantages and disadvantages

Change preposition

show examples

this

development. I,

however

, personally think that it will bring about negative development It is apparent that studying or working from

home

offers more convenience to both adults and children as they do not require to wake up two hours early to get ready and travel to the office or school.

Moreover

, studying or working from

home

also

allow the family to get closer; the parents have more

time

to take care of their child since they have more flexible hours.

Likewise

, the children

also

have more

time

to play because they do not have to spend

time

in the car

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

to school anymore.

Nevertheless

, working or studying from

home

also

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

many drawbacks. One of many drawbacks is despite not having to go to the office from nine to five, it means that the employees have to be ready for work at any

time

: the line between work and personal life becomes blurred. Similar to studying from

home

, since the teachers cannot arrange on-site examinations, the student will be assessed from work, which will result in having more homework.

Further

, for some subjects,

such

as swimming, it is useless to be conducted online and may affect the learning curve of children in the future. To conclude, it is true to say that working or studying at

home

can be convenient due to the fact that people can skip the transportation process.

However

, it does affect badly on work-life balance and

also

an effect on

child’s

Correct article usage

a child’s

show examples

development is very concerning.

Submitted by big8392 on Tue Sep 28 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some employers are giving more value on hiring people with good social skills apart from good qualifications. Do you agree or disagree that social skills are just as crucial as good qulification for success work?

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