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Writing Samples /
Band 6

More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #children #age #outweigh
Currently, it is quite common that people prefer to have babies later than it was in past. In
this
 essay, I will explain the possible reasons
of
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for
show examples
such
 a phenomenon and discuss
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
 and cons
of
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apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
To begin
 with, the possible reasons why some couples decided to have a child
in
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at
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their
Change the word
a
show examples
 later age are the positive aspects that it has.
Firstly
, in many countries, both men and women have an opportunity to make a career and become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
well-paid
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
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. In
this
 case, some pairs think that if their work and salary are stable, they will probably be able to care for their children more properly.
Secondly
, there are those who want to be more mentally prepared for having a toddler.
For example
, my friend did not want to have children earlier than
twenty five
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twenty-five
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year
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years
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 because she
was not understand
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did not understand
show examples
 what she should do
then
. Eventually, she got a child when she was
twenty six
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twenty-six
show examples
 and felt
herself
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apply
show examples
very confidently.
On the other hand
, there are some disadvantages of
this
 situation. One of them is the possible health issues.
In other words
, the later a woman has a baby, the more negative consequences may happen.
For instance
, my aunt became a mother when she was
thirty five
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thirty-five
show examples
 and it was difficult for her because of her age. Unfortunately, it led to the fact that doctors had to make an operation to save her and
toddler's
Correct article usage
the toddler's
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 life.
Besides
, youth usually has more strength and energy than middle-aged people.
Therefore
, they are likely to manage
with
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apply
show examples
physical problems, while they care for their children. In conclusion,
although
 having a child
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 later age has some positive sides, I think that its drawbacks outweigh
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
.
Submitted by mar16.f on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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