IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #children #age #outweigh
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Currently, it is quite common that people prefer to have babies later than it was in past. In
this
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 essay, I will explain the possible reasons
of
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for
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such
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 a phenomenon and discuss
pros
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the pros
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 and cons
of
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apply
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
To begin
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 with, the possible reasons why some couples decided to have a child
in
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at
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their
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a
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 later age are the positive aspects that it has.
Firstly
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, in many countries, both men and women have an opportunity to make a career and become
a
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apply
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well-paid
employee
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employees
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. In
this
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 case, some pairs think that if their work and salary are stable, they will probably be able to care for their children more properly.
Secondly
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, there are those who want to be more mentally prepared for having a toddler.
For example
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, my friend did not want to have children earlier than
twenty five
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twenty-five
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year
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years
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 because she
was not understand
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did not understand
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 what she should do
then
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. Eventually, she got a child when she was
twenty six
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twenty-six
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 and felt
herself
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apply
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very confidently.
On the other hand
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, there are some disadvantages of
this
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 situation. One of them is the possible health issues.
In other words
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, the later a woman has a baby, the more negative consequences may happen.
For instance
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, my aunt became a mother when she was
thirty five
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thirty-five
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 and it was difficult for her because of her age. Unfortunately, it led to the fact that doctors had to make an operation to save her and
toddler's
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the toddler's
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 life.
Besides
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, youth usually has more strength and energy than middle-aged people.
Therefore
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, they are likely to manage
with
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apply
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physical problems, while they care for their children. In conclusion,
although
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 having a child
in
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at
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 later age has some positive sides, I think that its drawbacks outweigh
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
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.
Submitted by mar16.f on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • delaying parenthood
  • financial stability
  • career advancement
  • personal goals
  • higher education
  • fertility treatments
  • relationship stability
  • health care improvements
  • personal development
  • postponing children
  • achieve milestones
  • family planning
  • modern society
  • life expectancy
  • paternal and maternal age
What to do next:
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