Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? what other factors contribute towards happiness?

It is true that
money
is one of the crucial elements in creating well-being and
happiness
.
However
, It is my view that it is indisputable that having
money
brings joy to one’s life but
money
alone cannot contribute to
happiness
, there are several aspects of life that can affect people’s
happiness
.
Money
is unarguably a fundamental element in the life of mankind. There are many people who suffer because they are broke;
for instance
, homeless people struggle as they do not have
money
to buy a shelter. To have
money
as a minimum standard means that you do not have to struggle.
Hence
,
money
is a fundamental means to achieve
happiness
.
Nevertheless
, having a lot of
money
does not guarantee
happiness
as there are numerous factors,
besides
money
, that are required to be happy. One of many factors is family. Family is everyone’s safe zone. Despite not having much
money
,
family
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
can support you and be there whenever you
need
Correct pronoun usage
itneed
show examples
. To illustrate, imagine an old millionaire lady without any child, it would be very lonely as she does not have anyone to share or care
.
Change preposition
for.
show examples
Another factor is good health.
Although
money
can buy excellent medical facilities, it cannot buy good health. People can do many things if they stay healthy: hiking, skydiving, or swimming. These kinds of activities can contribute to one’s
happiness
as well. To conclude, though it is apparent that
money
is a fundamental factor that contributes to
happiness
, there are other factors that contribute to
happiness
as well,
such
as family and good health.
Therefore
, possessing a large amount of
money
does not mean that
happiness
is guaranteed.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Promoting happiness
  • Essential factors
  • Financial stability
  • Material wealth
  • Personal fulfillment
  • Contentment
  • Basic needs
  • Maslow's hierarchy of needs
  • Social connections
  • Pursuing passions
  • Well-being
  • Mental health
  • Spiritual practices
  • Personal growth
  • Community service
  • Societal contribution
  • Philanthropy
  • Joy
  • Satisfaction
  • Prosperity
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