IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In many countries today, people buy a range of household goods (television, microwave, oven and rice cookers). Is it a positive or negative development ?

#countries #people #range #household #goods #television #microwave #oven #rice #cookers #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, thanks to the development of technology, a great many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
family’ objects, which are extremely useful for personal
life
Use synonyms
, are bought by households.
This
Linking Words
 essay will study the underlying roots
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
 and cons of that issue. In my very point of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
,
household
Use synonyms
goods
Use synonyms
 bring more positive impact to
people
Use synonyms
’
life
Use synonyms
 than negative. It is undisputed that
household
Use synonyms
 accommodations act as a precursor to our
life
Use synonyms
 in various fields. Saving
time
Use synonyms
 is one of the most advantages that they bring to our
life
Use synonyms
. While our ancestors had to spend a lot of
time
Use synonyms
to create
Change the verb form
creating
show examples
fire
Use synonyms
 by rub two wood sticks together to create
fire
Use synonyms
, which can help them cook and keep warm for a wild, modern civilians can create
fire
Use synonyms
 immediately by using a gas stove allowing them to cook faster and save their quality
time
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
household
Use synonyms
 accommodations are equipped with a wide range of safety features, which lend
people
Use synonyms
 a hand to avoid some alarming problems
such
Linking Words
 as houses on
fire
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
,
household
Use synonyms
 objects can bring advantages in either save
people
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 or make them more safety.
However
Linking Words
, while a wealth of redeeming traits of
household
Use synonyms
goods
Use synonyms
 are widely acknowledged, there are some drawbacks
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
that have to be considered. Many
people
Use synonyms
 nowadays fully rely on
household
Use synonyms
goods
Use synonyms
, which can help them do anything in their house.
Hence
Linking Words
, on the one hand,
people
Use synonyms
 will not know how to do
household
Use synonyms
 chores without the support of
household
Use synonyms
 objects.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, they will be too lazy to do housework or exercise, which can trigger some physical-related problems, especially fatigue.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
household
Use synonyms
 accommodations
also
Linking Words
 bring some indirectly negative
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
 to human lives. In conclusion, with the prosperity of technology,
household
Use synonyms
goods
Use synonyms
become
Add a missing verb
have become
show examples
 more popular
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
people
Use synonyms
’ lives. In my opinion, they can bring many conveniences to
Add an article
the user
a user
show examples
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
,
however
Linking Words
, they should not heavily rely on
household
Use synonyms
goods
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: