With access to the internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should thus limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree or disagree?

#access #internet #media #websites #children #situations #adults #limit

I agree with the fact that parents of millennials

kids

have a huge responsibility in restricting the

internet

and social media access for their children, where they might be exposed to harmful situations eventually to social and mental trauma.

Initially

Add a comma

,Initially

show examples

we will discuss

about

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

the behavioural problems arising out of addiction to the

internet

and

subsequently

about the serious consequences of the deadly games on the

internet

without parental guidance.

Firstly

kids

browsing social media websites are easily attracted to obscene and inappropriate content in the form of games and videos. If the not curtailed child may develop altered behaviour like stress,violence and eventually addiction that will take a toll on their mental wellbeing.

For Instance

, a recent survey conducted on

kids

playing online shooting games like PubG shown a higher incidence of aggressive behaviour among players compared to the control group and they

also

exhibited withdrawal tendencies after their abstinence from playing.

Secondly

, access to certain sections of the

internet

can have extreme life-threatening consequences. Particularly, In the year 2016, the juvenile population across the world fell into the prey of an online game called 'Blue whale' which gained notoriety in inflicting self-harming tendencies and allegedly died in few cases. If the parents inspected their

kids

' web activities adverse outcomes could have been readily averted To conclude, Children exposed to inappropriate content on the

internet

and social media websites are prone to develop behavioural problems and it can be lethal in some cases.

Therefore

I completely agree that it is the duty of each and every parent to restrict the child's

internet

usage to avoid these untoward consequences.

Submitted by dr.bharath8 on Tue Oct 05 2021

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

dangerous situations
limit access to the internet
inappropriate content
online predators
physical and mental health
monitoring and guiding
online safety
school curriculum

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With access to the internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should thus limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You have a spare room in your Apartment that you would like to rent out to a student. Write a letter to your Student Accommodation Officer of local college and say 1. Where is your apartment located? 2. When will the room be available 3. What are the requirements for a student to stay?

Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

In many countries, plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish. They cause and lanwater d pollution, and so they should be banned. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinio

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