Some people think high-end technology can prevent and cut down the rate of committing crime. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #technology #rate #crime

The usage of sophisticated

technology

as the means to reduce

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime rates has raised conflicting opinions. In my perspective, I completely agree that the advent of cutting-edge

technology

can reduce the crime rate or even prevent someone from committing

such

actions.

First

and foremost,

technology

has revolutionized the way monitoring can be done.

For instance

, security no longer need to go over all the places in a mall to find the potential criminal action, they can just watch it from the screen with a CCTV recording which can show people’s activities in a specific place at a specific time.

In addition

, it can help authorities to identify the culprit if there is shoplifting going on, quickly and effectively.

Hence

, the efficiency of

this

technology

will have a big impact in solving unlawful

act

Fix the agreement mistake

acts

show examples

Secondly

, with

technology

like microdrone, which is a tiny device with an infrared feature and has the ability to fly over 350ft above the ground without public noticing, the police can monitor the crowd in public places

such

as in a field of Coachella music festival. Violation often happens when there is a chance and that chance is massively increased in a crowded place where the crowd

negligent

Add a missing verb

is negligent

show examples

about their own safety or property. In

this

situation, a thief can work freely without the fear of getting caught. But, with the implementation of microdrones,

such

action can be prevented and can be solved immediately.

As a result

, the crime rates will be reduced and society can feel safer

to go

Change the verb form

going

show examples

to a crowded place. Current science advancement has

also

made it possible to gather data at a click of a button. With a DNA database, the detection of possible suspects for a felony can be done swiftly and correctly. So, the right felons can be caught and prevent them from being free and doing other potentially harmful actions. In conclusion, the implementation of advanced

technology

can help reduce and prevent illegal and lawbreaking activities in an effective and efficient way.

Submitted by solerammmmm on Sat Oct 09 2021

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

334 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think high-end technology can prevent and cut down the rate of committing crime. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

There is certainly a difference in thoughts, ideas and actions between children, their parents and grandparents. Why do these differences exist? Does it cause problems in your community, in your opinion?

Providing a national system in a country where the unemployed receive a regular payment only encourages people not to seek work and puts an unreasonable strain on a country’s financial resources.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of diverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.