some people think money is tge best gift to youngsters, while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #money #tge #gift #youngsters

As we all know the giving

gift

is a part of individual tradition until now but most

people

having a dilemma of choosing presents especially to the teenagers despite others claiming cash is the best.

This

essay will discuss both sides and

Change the preposition

show examples

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

if I will give the best gifts to youngsters I will offer something

that is

more useful and memorable

one

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

To begin

this

, most

people

nowadays finding difficulties in choosing the

gift

to offer because young

people

nowadays are having a number of choices in life. Even though, I will still choose to have a

gift

that is

unforgettable and useful to them every day.

For example

, my sister was celebrated her debut

last

year and

then

her phone was broken at that time, so

what

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

I did

instead

of giving her money I sent her a brand new phone as a birthday

presents

Fix the agreement mistake

present

show examples

and I’m glad that she likes it. So, money is not the precious

gift

of all. In contrary to

this

, others said that its better if the money to be given.

This

case depends upon the situation because some

people

are busy and they do not have time to look for a

gift

For instance

, they will give the cash as a present because it a hassle-free but most of the time now parents are like that. There is a chance that if you give hard cash to the young

people

or to your children there is a possibility they will spend in the wrong way.

As a result

, they will ask more and they do not understand what’s the value of it. To conclude, despite other

people

saying monetary is the greatest thing,

still

Add a comma

,still

show examples

I believe the finest

gift

you can give those worth remembering and for lifetime value.

Submitted by ding on Sat Oct 09 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people think money is tge best gift to youngsters, while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In some countries, owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you thimk this is a positive or negative situation?

People today are surrounded by all kinds af advertising. this both affects what they think is important and is a negative influence on their lives. To what extent to you agree or disagree?

Some people think that men and women have differrnt qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

At the present time, the popuation of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage of this situation outweight the disadvantages?

Some countries focus on health care and education benefits while others on infrastructure and employment. Which do you think would be more beneficial for the population? Give specific details and examples to support your opinion.