Some people think that mobile phones are harmful for children, while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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People hold different views as to whether mobile
phones
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are detrimental to
children
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or not. In my opinion,
this
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depends very much on how the
phones
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are used and how that use is supervised as to whether they are harmful
for
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to
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children
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or not. On the one hand, some people think
children
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can be harmed by using mobile
phones
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mainly because the games and apps found on
phones
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, which are mostly not educational, can easily become addictive.
This
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results in
children
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engaging less in healthy physical activities and spending less time on homework, both of which can have dire consequences in the long run.
Furthermore
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, using mobile
phones
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exposes
children
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to unmonitored social media platforms where predators might be lurking in wait by taking advantage of the anonymity offered online.
On the other hand
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, mobile
phones
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can actually protect
children
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by allowing
parents
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to track their geographical location and contact them immediately if necessary. Never before have
parents
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been able to know the exact whereabouts of their
child
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minute by minute.
In addition
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,
the
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apply
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instant communication provides essential security for
children
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in times of crisis.
Lastly
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, mobile
phones
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do allow access to educational apps specifically created for
children
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which, if used wisely, can
further
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their education.
Finally
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, I believe that if
parents
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monitor how the
smart phone
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smartphone
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is being used by their
child
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, it can be beneficial for a
child
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's development. By blocking certain social media sites,
parents
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can be sure their
child
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is safe whilst being online.
Moreover
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,
by
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apply
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setting time limits on how long their
child
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can use the phone means that it will not interfere with a
child
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's educational development and will avoid any form of addiction. In conclusion,
children
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are only at risk when using a mobile phone if they are not being supervised and are not given strict guidelines to follow which are set by their
parents
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. Comments:
This
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essay presents a clear opinion which is fully explained. Both sides have been clearly discussed. Ideas are extended and supporting points
relevant
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are relevant
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. Ideas are organised
logical
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logically
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and a good range of linking words have been used. Grammar is both complex and accurate. Vocabulary is topic related and less common items are used.
Submitted by amony6769 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • excessive screen time
  • health problems
  • eye strain
  • poor posture
  • disrupted sleep patterns
  • inappropriate content
  • addiction
  • reliance
  • impair
  • social skills
  • educational tools
  • digital literacy
  • mitigated
  • parental guidance
  • safeguards
  • responsible use
  • monitored
  • development
  • benefits
  • risks
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