It is more important to earn a lot of money than to have a satisfying job

#money #job

Many people face

dilemma

Fix the agreement mistake

dilemmas

show examples

when they choose their jobs: what they really want or

high

Correct article usage

a high

show examples

salary

. If

one

chooses what

one

really wants,

one

can be happy with a

job

but how much

one

earns from a

job

can not be ignored either.

However

, given

choice

Correct article usage

a choice

show examples

between those two, I would definitely weigh more on whether I am happy with my

job

than having a high

salary

. First of all, being happy with a

job

is more important than having a high

salary

Correct your spelling

we can not enjoy working and indulge in what we do, it means we gain nothing even though we are earning a high

salary

Secondly

, being happy with a

job

can bring even more success. If

one

works for

one

’s goal or dream, not for money,

one

would put a lot of effort

Change preposition

into

show examples

one

’s work.

Then

, there is

not

Correct your spelling

show examples

doubt that outcomes or results coming from

one

’s work will be more successful.

To conclude

, I strongly agree that being happy with a

job

is more important than having a high

salary

since money can not buy happiness and sometimes people can be more successful when they are happy with their jobs.

However

, I believe people should listen to what they really eager from their hearts, especially when they make important decisions like choosing their jobs which might influence their entire lives.

Submitted by nargizataishybay on Tue Oct 12 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

226 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is more important to earn a lot of money than to have a satisfying job

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Teenagers are prohibited to bring mobile phones to school. To what extend you agree or disagree?

Many countries have embraced tourism as a way to boost their economies and create Tobs for local residents. However some argue that tourism can have negative impact's on the environment and local culture's. What are the advantages and disadvantages of tourism for a country?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house and building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

The percentage of overweight children children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last decade. discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.