An increasing trend nowadays is for young adults to play computer games. Some people say this is a negative development. Discuss and give your opinion.

#trend #adults #computer #games #people #development

There can be little doubt that more and more

people

are becoming addicted to computer

games

and

this

is especially true for young

adults

. My view is

this

is a dangerous development for both

society

and the

people

concerned. The dangers to

society

of computer gaming addiction among young

adults

are clear. There is strong evidence to show that there is a connection between violent crime and playing

games

that do not respect human life. It has been shown

for instance

that while there is little harm in a few hours of recreational gaming a week,

people

who spend many hours a day at their gaming consoles are much more likely to commit crimes.

This

is particularly true of young men in their twenties and thirties who are typically the section of

society

who become most addicted to

games

. The problems that too much gaming can cause young

adults

as individuals are equally apparent. One particular problem is that they are at a stage of life when they need to concentrate on establishing relationships and perhaps starting families. Again there is evidence to show that

people

who play too many

games

find it more difficult to build a lasting relationship and if they do, they provide a poor example to their children. Another set of problems that gaming addiction can cause in

this

age bracket is at work.

This

is because too much gaming can cause loss of concentration and that in turn can lead to reduced efficiency in the workplace.

This

is of course a problem for the company and may

also

lead to the individual failing to get

promotion

Add an article

a promotion

show examples

or even being fired. In

conclusion

Add a comma

,conclusion

show examples

my own view is very clear. The growth of the gaming habit among young

adults

can have negative effects

for

Change preposition

show examples

society

as a whole and individuals both at home and at work.

Submitted by jason on Sat Oct 16 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

309 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Addiction
Neglect
Academic responsibilities
Social interactions
Physical health
Obesity
Poor posture
Repetitive strain injuries
Prolonged periods of inactivity
Improper ergonomics
Desensitize
Real-world violence
Aggressive thoughts
Cognitive skills
Problem-solving
Strategic planning
Quick decision-making
Transferable skills
Educational settings
Professional settings
Social activity
Multiplayer games
Teamwork
Cooperation
Communication skills
Friendships
Escapism
Stress relief
Unwind
Relax

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An increasing trend nowadays is for young adults to play computer games. Some people say this is a negative development. Discuss and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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some think increasing business and culural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the dissappearance of national identity. Discuss both Views and state your own opinion.

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Due to the effects of globalization, the culture of some countries are influenced by others. Some people think this is a positive process. Others think this is a threat to cultural identity. Discuss both sides and give your opinion