In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend

#people #hobby #trend

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Recently, the purpose of shopping changes from a routine domestic task to a

hobby

Use synonyms

. It is widely accepted that

this

Linking Words

offers many benefits.

However

Linking Words

, shopping as a

hobby

Use synonyms

can

also

Linking Words

have many drawbacks.

This

Linking Words

essay will consider the benefit of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shopping as a

hobby

Use synonyms

and the negative effects that could occur. The

first

Linking Words

and most obvious benefit of shopping as a

hobby

Use synonyms

Remove the article

apply

show examples

decreasing stress. Nowadays

people

Use synonyms

get more stress due to the hectic city,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

Linking Words

consequently

Add a comma

,consequently

show examples

the easiest way to make

people

Use synonyms

satisfied is spending

money

Use synonyms

with the thing they love

such

Linking Words

as food, a fashion or an electronic gadget in

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

Therefore

Linking Words

, shopping tends to become

Change preposition

apply

show examples

one

Use synonyms

kind of

hobby

Use synonyms

that everyday

people

Use synonyms

will spend

money

Use synonyms

with their

friend

Fix the agreement mistake

friends

show examples

and family.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the changing purpose of shopping to

Use synonyms

hobby

Add an article

the hobby

a hobby

show examples

can strengthen the family bond because shopping will not

Add a missing verb

be a

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

responsibility for the mother who looks after the house but it will be the

time

Use synonyms

that family can help each other. Despite many benefits, shopping

also

Linking Words

has numerous drawbacks. The possible

one

Use synonyms

is overspending the

money

Use synonyms

. If

people

Use synonyms

think of shopping as a

hobby

Use synonyms

, they will use

money

Use synonyms

less effective.

For example

Linking Words

, fashion shopping is often changing trend

Change preposition

apply

show examples

every month, so it has to use numerous

money

Use synonyms

for following fashion trends. As the result, they will not have

sparing

Change the verb form

to spare

show examples

money

Use synonyms

for

using

Replace the word

use

show examples

in the emergency case.

In addition

Linking Words

, shopping for entertainment is

one

Use synonyms

of the

Use synonyms

time consuming

Add a hyphen

time-consuming

show examples

activities. It will take more

time

Use synonyms

than a routine domestic task because they will enjoy shopping which the

time

Use synonyms

flies. In conclusion, many

people

Use synonyms

use their leisure

time

Use synonyms

for shopping as

one

Use synonyms

of their hobbies. Spending

money

Use synonyms

on the things that they love could reduce the stress,

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

overspending could occur less saving. So

people

Use synonyms

have to learn how to manage their

money

Use synonyms

and balance the

money

Use synonyms

for the

hobby

Use synonyms

and the future life.

Submitted by sahapol.rs on Sun Oct 17 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

315 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
retail therapy
materialism
disposable income
economic growth
financial instability
environmental impact
social interaction
community building
emotional satisfaction
advertising influence
shopping habits

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn, and should not have to pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some individuals assume they do not need to pay taxes to the state and keep all the money they earn. In this essay, I disagree with this view because action plays a vital role in the fairness of society and provides the citizens with some essential services.
5
band
Social media has replaced the traditional method of communicating and people use more and more of social media to communicate and follow news and events. Do you think that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
The traditional method has changed with social media, many individuals use it to communicate, to read the news and to know the events. The benefits are people can communicate everywhere and all the time, and they get the news and events quickly. The drawback is that the traditional method of communicating will be forgotten by the next generation.
6
band
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays some individuals may think it is the best approach sometimes to face unfortunate events like an unfavourable job or deficit of money and make no changes. While others may not agree with particular beliefs and try to improve these terrible conditions. This essay will discuss both perspectives and provide my own viewpoint.
6.5
band
Most people agree that money cannot be happiness. Why is happiness difficult to define? How can people achieve happiness?
Some people argue that happiness comes from money, while other people think that happiness cannot be bought by anything. I believe that there are a lot of factors to make people happy, not only by having much money. People have their own way of considering what happiness is and what things can make them satisfied.
5.5
band
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The visuals illustrate a common garden when it first established one hundred and four years ago and a similar now day. I will describe the changes then and now.

In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend

Your opinion

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn, and should not have to pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Social media has replaced the traditional method of communicating and people use more and more of social media to communicate and follow news and events. Do you think that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Most people agree that money cannot be happiness. Why is happiness difficult to define? How can people achieve happiness?

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.