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Writing Samples
Band 5

In Some Countries, Criminal Trials Are Shown On Television For Public. Do The Advantages Of This Outweigh The Disadvantages

#countries #trials #television #outweigh
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The
Use synonyms
trials
Change the noun form
trial
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 procedures in many situations draw a considerable amount of attention from media worldwide.
However
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, there is an ongoing debate between two points of view of podcasting those
trials
Use synonyms
 on TV or not. In my perspective, I believe that the pros of
present
Wrong verb form
presenting
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 those cases in media outweigh the cons as we will discuss. As a starting point, undoubtedly, many crimes in the present times have developed and become more creative and devious.
Hence
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, showing to the public that those ingenious defendants got caught by the justice system, will definitely deter many potential criminals by contemplating the possible repercussions.
Secondly
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, the media has a powerful impact in monitoring the justice system and
inspect
Wrong verb form
inspecting
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 any possible corruption from judges and juries. So not only these live
trials
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 will help society but
also
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 will prevent any degeneration.
On the other hand
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, many opponents
for
Change preposition
of
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 showing those
trials
Use synonyms
 on television argue that it could
make
Verb problem
be
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 a huge distraction for both judges and the jury.
Consequently
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, if
the
Correct article usage
apply
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public opinion has sympathy towards the convict, it could lead to
exoneration
Correct article usage
the exoneration
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to
Change preposition
of
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 the criminal. Certainly,
this
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 case
is needed
Wrong verb form
needs
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 to
consider
Wrong verb form
be considered
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 as the duties of judges and jury are sacred creed and need to be free from any pressure from people.
To conclude
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, many audiences nowadays are attracted to live
trials
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,
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as
Correct word choice
and as
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 a
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
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 many channels prefer to specialise segments to show those lawsuits.
While
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 there are some drawbacks to
this
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 trend, these podcasts are ripe with benefits to society and the justice system as well.
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task response
Ensure that you fully address all aspects of the essay question, including both the advantages and disadvantages of televising criminal trials. Expand on the disadvantages to provide a more balanced argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay demonstrates good organization and logical progression of ideas. However, aim to create stronger topic sentences and more cohesive paragraph development to enhance overall coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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