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Band 4

Some people think that technology makes life overly complexed, so we should make life simpler without using the technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #technology #life
It is the most talked-about topic recently that technological innovations increase the complicated level of life overall,
therefore
, technology should not be applied to eliminate
this
 complexity. In my perspective,
this
 opinion does not make sense. Several factors seem at play to support my point of view.
To begin
 with, digitalized development contributes to improved productivity in
economic
Correct article usage
the economic
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 aspect with the increase in connectivity among workers and better cooperation even in
remote
Add an article
the remote
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workplace
Fix the agreement mistake
workplaces
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 via excellent online working infrastructure.
This
 tendency seems to boom since the pandemic
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 when employers work from home without undermining efficiency; and
this
 achievement cannot be reached without modernized technological improvement.
Moreover
, everyday lives become simpler and more convenient because
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 innovations.
For instance
, food delivery applications simplify enjoying delicious cuisines to a few clicks; and ride-hailing
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
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 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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smartphones provide an opportunity for us to receive
safe
Correct article usage
a safe
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 car experience cheaper.
Last
 but not the least, digital progress provides easier access to education from kindergarten to adult training, with only searching for some information online. We used to spend great effort to question others to judge which is
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 education resource,
however
,
this
 aim can be simply met by reading comments below the websites. Receiving education may just mean sitting beside a computer
instead
 of travelling a long distance to enter the distant classroom. With information more transparent, possibly much cheaper the price of training could be. In a word, modern technology plays a vital role in making our lives easier and more comfortable, from working, eating, driving and training and so on. So research and development in technology is the
base
Correct your spelling
basis
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 of progress, which the government should spend budget on.
Submitted by 908133411 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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