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Writing Samples
Band 8.5

Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not effective. Education and job training should be used instead. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #criminals #prison #education #job
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Several people believe that sending criminals to prison is not a good solution and the better way for them is to be trained for jobs and education. I think training knowledge in jobs and education is really helpful for criminals but sometimes we have to send them to prison. On the
first
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 hand, the people who break the law should be sent to jail in some cases.
Firstly
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, sending the gangster who has serious wrongdoing
such
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 as robbery or murder to jail is the best way to avoid them committing again. Strict punishment from the law will help them to appreciate their life and learn from their experience, which are the main reasons to reduce the proportion of lawbreakers.
Secondly
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, sending hooligans to jail will be a proper demonstration of the government to limit a serious threat to society.
For example
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, when the youth watch news on television, the results of violations which they have to receive if they break the law will be shown.
On the other hand
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, education and job training are other good ways to tackle crimes.
Firstly
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, culprits will have another chance to remake their life if they are equipped with working knowledge, which is the main solution to change their destiny.
Therefore
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, they can look for normal jobs and start getting married to a good girl like every citizen, which helps them to get through the dark period of time in the past.
In addition
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,
this
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 is a suitable punishment for minor cases
such
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 as shoplifting and pickpocketing. It can encourage crooks to get through their past and move to a better future. In conclusion, both solutions are effective so I think the government should implement them properly to reduce the rate of criminals.
Submitted by thanhhai29102000 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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