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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some high school students work part-time in addition to going to school. what are the advantages and disadvantages of high school students having part-time jobs?

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Some
students
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work
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 outside of their
school
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 hours to earn extra
money
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. As with anything else, there are both positive and negative aspects to it.
This
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 essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of
students
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 working part-time jobs. Through their part-time jobs, they will find out the value of
money
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. Working will
also
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 teach them that they need to
work
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 hard to get what they want. Usually,
students
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 get pocket
money
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 from their parents to buy things they want. If the pocket
money
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 is not enough, they simply ask for more from their parents, without giving much thought about how hard their parents need to
work
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 to support them. Working outside will teach youngers life experiences, that cannot be taught at
school
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. These experiences will help them face the world when they grow up. They will
also
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 make more friends and acquaintances in their working life. These are some of the benefits that
students
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 will receive by working after
school
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.
Students
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 usually need to spend at least five to six hours at
school
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 for their study and they still need to
work
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 on their homework afterwards. Working part-time might affect the
students
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' study, especially if they are not good at managing their schedules. If they spend their leisure time earning extra pocket
money
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, they might not be able to spend time with their friends and families. One possible drawback of teenagers working part-time
,
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apply
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 is that they might enjoy working too much that they might want to give up on their studies.
This
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 could happen if they originally do not have much interest in
school
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work
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. In conclusion, while working gives life lessons to
students
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, they need to know their capacity and find balance in
school
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, study,
work
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 and home. These are the benefits and drawbacks of high
school
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students
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 working part-time.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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