at the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compered with the number of older people. do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

Nowadays, the population of some nations the number of young people are a lot more than the aged people. I believe that

nations

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in nations

show examples

this

situation the benefits are more than the disadvantages. I would like to discuss both

side

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sides

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views

Fix the agreement mistake

view

show examples

this

essay. On one hand, young adults play an important role in the society as they can

Correct your spelling

perform

show examples

preform

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perform

show examples

better at work in many

aspacts

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aspects

such

as creation,

effectioncy

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efficiency

effectively

and physically,

thus

increased the GDP of countries.

For example

, Hong Kong is a city

which

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that

show examples

always has

high

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a high

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rate of GDP because the percentage of X generation is much more than the elder population.

Moreover

, new generations have better creation they can

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create

show examples

creat

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create

show examples

a better world.

For instance

, the most present technologies

such

as the Internet,

Smartphone

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smartphones

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and some effective

mediccines

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medicines

are invented by

the

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apply

show examples

young people.

Therefore

, they can

improved

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improve

show examples

our

live

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life

show examples

and lead the nation to another level.

On the other hand

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apply

show examples

this

crecomstance

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circumstance

also

cause some drawbacks.

Firstly

, the education funding might become a serious issue if the government have to support all the children's school feeds from

praimre

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primary

prime

school

untill

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until

university graduated because

this

is a

hugh

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huge

high

amount of money and

this

might

leads

Wrong verb form

lead

show examples

the government a

finacial

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financial

problem.

Furthermore

, the cost of marriage and housing commitment are two major

issue

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issues

show examples

. Especially in some

countise

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counties

countries

or cities where have

the

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show examples

limiedation

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limitation

of land. Because of

this

, young

adutls

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adults

might be hard to get

marrie

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married

dut

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due

show examples

to the high price of housing that they cannot

afforted

Correct your spelling

afforded

afford

. To sum up, there are some pros and cons with the high rate of young adults in some countries.

However

, I believe that the advantages outweigh that the disadvantages.

Submitted by fankie.cecil on Sun Oct 24 2021

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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at the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compered with the number of older people. do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some universities students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Other believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some governments say how many children a family can hare in their country. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. Do you agree or disagree?

some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree oe disagree with tgis opinion?

Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree? You should write at least 250 words.

In many countries, plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish. They cause water and land pollution, and so they should be banned. To what extent do you agree with this statement?