Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species while others think it is a waste of valuable money. What is your opinion?

Every living animal and plant has a sole and purpose in

this

world, and if we remove it from its natural habitat, it could lead to the destruction of that abode.

However

, I believe that the protection of wildlife is of paramount importance, because of how their lives are intricately woven with ours.

Therefore

, I agree that it is important for money to be spent on protecting endangered species. I will substantiate my reasoning in the course of

this

essay.

First

and foremost, it is important to realise, that beasts existed on

this

planet way before our technologies and cities grew, thereby meaning that we have encroached onto their land. The more we destroy, the more they will have to move into our cities to look for food, resulting in altercations with humans.

This

is why the government has to be more involved in protecting these beasties so that those who share the area with the animals can live in harmony with them.

For example

, the Sambar deer is the staple food for the Bengal Tiger in India.

However

, because of deforestation, their habitats are being lost resulting in numbers moving on or even dying out. Since their numbers are dwindling, the tigers look for the

easy meal, which are the humans living in the same locality.

On the other hand

, sections of society believe in the advancement of mankind, which means that more of the government s funds, should be put into the education, healthcare, and transportation sectors, as doing so will create more jobs and thereby boost the economy. In conclusion, whilst I believe that the growth of a country is important, I

also

believe that it is important to preserve the wildlife of a particular locality because certain animals are only available in certain habitats, and because of

this

many people world over will want to come and see them in their natural habitats void from human interference.

This

will

also

boost the tourism of a country.

Submitted by Nigelvictorlawrence on Mon Oct 25 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

331 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species while others think it is a waste of valuable money. What is your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

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Innovation is often driven by the pursuit of profit and economic growth. However, some argue that innovation should be targeted towards addressing social and environmental issues. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

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