The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers and footballers. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#media #attention #lives #relationships #celebrities #actors #singers #footballers #time #people

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Nowadays , many people pay attention to what their favourite bias do or what they eat and

also

Linking Words

how they spend their vacation. In my opinion , I agree with

this

Linking Words

statement and

this

Linking Words

is essay will show reasons. To start with , In

this

Linking Words

,society it is easy to follow celebrities' activities through online platforms via Instagram , Facebook and Twitter. So they can share a private zone of life with their fan clubs because they need to narrow the

space

Use synonyms

with followers by letting them know about how they live on vacation , what activity they do and

also

Linking Words

what they eat. The population can know what they want to.

This

Linking Words

is will affect the privacy of actors or singers.

For example

Linking Words

, if someone is not a real fan club and he wants to destroy his reputation , he can do it easily since the celebrities show everything about their life.

In addition

Linking Words

, showing everything to everyone is not a safe zone because they will get more pressure when doing something new the actors or singers

also

Linking Words

need a

space

Use synonyms

to focus on it and do it privately because it will have a chance to get success more than doing it publicly and when they do it until the end and release that idea or song to the public it will get more excited.

For example

Linking Words

, If you were a singer , you would keep the secret about the new song until it was released. In conclusion , in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

Add a comma

,society

show examples

there are many celebrities from each industry like music , movie , youtube and

also

Linking Words

a business. Everyone needs their own

space

Use synonyms

and not to share every moment of their life with social. So in my opinion , I think it is important to have a private

space

Use synonyms

Submitted by nppwrs on Mon Oct 25 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers and footballers. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

All parents want the best opportunities for their children. There are some people who think that school should teach children skills, but others think having a range of subjects is better for a children’s future. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some people think people working in creative arts should be financially supported by government. Others think they should find financial support from other resources. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

“Rapid advances in technology will make the world of the future a more dangerous place” Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons.