Some say that watching television among children has detrimental effects on their growth while Othes say otherwise. Do you agree or disagree? Discuss both views?

#say #television #children #effects #growth #othes

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Watching

television

Use synonyms

has become a hobby for today's generation which is thought harmful to

children

Use synonyms

's development and some people believe it is beneficial for them. I discuss both views in the upcoming paragraphs and agree with the former view.

Firstly

Linking Words

, people who argue that

television

Use synonyms

is beneficial for

children

Use synonyms

are considering that international programs encourage kids to work hard and grow worldwide because celebrities are cast by some channels that influence the young generation to show their talents through media and become successful in life. To cite an example, in India, there are many shows which are seen by kids and they work hard to reach those stages and participate in them,

consequently

Linking Words

, they get selected and become popular Worldwide.

Secondly

Linking Words

, spending excessive amounts of

time

Use synonyms

watching

television

Use synonyms

not only stops

children

Use synonyms

's cognitive growth but

also

Linking Words

wastes their

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which

Correct word choice

when

show examples

they should be playing outdoor activities

as well as

Linking Words

socializing.

For example

Linking Words

, an International survey has been conducted that 80% of

children

Use synonyms

invest their

time

Use synonyms

watching

television

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of going outside to play with others,

therefore

Linking Words

, they face some health obstacles

such

Linking Words

as obesity as they do not do physical activity.

As a result

Linking Words

, they become introverted.

Also

Linking Words

television

Use synonyms

does not encourage deep thinking and concentration which is created by reading books and doing outdoor exercises. In conclusion,

children

Use synonyms

can benefit from watching

television

Use synonyms

and become famous in their lives but investing a lot of

time

Use synonyms

in watching

television

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

halts their cognitive function and creates various kinds of diseases.

Submitted by maninderdeep on Sun Mar 31 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

To enhance task response, ensure your argument is evenly balanced between the discussed views before stating your stance. This will make your position more nuanced and well-supported.

task achievement

Support your main points with more specific, detailed examples. While you've provided a general example, adding more particular instances could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Work on improving the variety and complexity of your sentences to make your essay more engaging. Using a range of sentence structures can help maintain the reader's interest.

coherence cohesion

Connect your paragraphs and ideas more smoothly. Transition words or phrases can help to guide the reader through your argument more seamlessly.

coherence cohesion

Your essay provides a clear introduction, effectively setting up the discussion that follows.

coherence cohesion

You successfully conclude your essay, summarizing your views and reinforcing your stance to the reader.

coherence cohesion

Main points are supported and contribute to the argument you're making, showing that you have thought about the different sides of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather to benefit them as individual. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often said that schools primarily aim to mould children into productive members of society and the workforce rather than focusing on their individual development and well-being. From my point of view, I partly agree with this view.
5
band
Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Yến linh
In the modern era , education is one of the most factor very essential and some people think that the government should make a decision : free fee for all for all university students even if the economy background is so bad . In my opinion , I completely agree and it will be discussed in the following paragraphs .
8
band
Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments.
Nowadays, many animal advocates assert that conducting experiments on animals is a brutal activity that must be stopped as soon as possible. Additionally, these experiments are crucial to saving human lives, and moreover, there are several compelling reasons that justify these activities. Nevertheless, I am certain it is unfair for other creatures to bear the cost of human existence on the Earth, and thus, there is a better alternative for this purpose.
7.5
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Recently, it can be seen from commercials that there is a specific focus on introducing new features. This essay will analyze the reasons and then I will indicate my own view of the positive side of this development.
8
band
You were recently helped by an employee at the airport, write to the airport manager. In your letter:- - describe the problem - Talk about how you were helped - Suggest how to reward the employee
The reason I am writing to you is to inform you of your incredibly professional employer, whose name is Khaleb.

Some say that watching television among children has detrimental effects on their growth while Othes say otherwise. Do you agree or disagree? Discuss both views?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather to benefit them as individual. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Yến linh

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

You were recently helped by an employee at the airport, write to the airport manager. In your letter:- - describe the problem - Talk about how you were helped - Suggest how to reward the employee