Childhood obesity is becoming a problem throughout the developed world. Because of this, some people think that adverts for fast food, sweets and sugary snacks should not be allowed in school and college. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this ?

#childhood #obesity #world #people #adverts #food #sweets #snacks #school #college

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Most

people

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believe that kids under age are being obese, being a worldwide problem. In

this

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Correct article usage

apply

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scenario

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,scenario

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the private institutions should take care of the child's health, by prohibiting junk

food

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such

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as sweets, sugar and so much more, within the premises. I will discuss my view in the following paragraphs and give my agreement or disagreement on it.

Firstly

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, In recent times numerous students, those who are underage, not even 18 above pupils are affected by obesity. The main reason for

this

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disease is the actual care within the child's behaviour is not taking care of

parents

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as well as their institute

people

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. If the toddlers are attracted to unhealthy

food

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. There should be

also

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an alternative to it, wherein teachers help them to teach how important is to eat healthily and

also

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feel the same.

For example

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, In the United States, in

schools

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,schools

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it is a very strict rule that kids should only eat within their college , so as they eat healthily and

also

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to have an equal share of

food

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This

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is a great effort from the country, to change the way

people

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look at health.

Secondly

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, The father/ mother should be around the peddler to observe their activities, within their time. Because most

people

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think and believe that regardless of anything, the actions of the elders affect the whole system of the children. Like everyone says

parents

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are the

first

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teachers. So, they see what their

parents

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are been doing.

This

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impact has its advantages and its disadvantages

also

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, but

this

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also

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second

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opportunity and take valid changes in their eating behaviour.

For example

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, The children have to get nicer options for their meal., which is healthy at the same time it is

also

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attractive to the child to eat.

This

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makes a large impact on these obesity problems. In conclusion, I strongly believe that not only the Institutions can help the children problem, but

also

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the

parents

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should take an equal share of responsibility to eliminate various help factors. Schools should have a healthy

food

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functionality within which students can get over

this

Linking Words

Submitted by tassajay93 on Wed Oct 27 2021

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

352 words

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Childhood obesity is becoming a problem throughout the developed world. Because of this, some people think that adverts for fast food, sweets and sugary snacks should not be allowed in school and college. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this ?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays the government are investing more in public transport including buses and train than in building new roads. What are the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development.

The health benefits of physical exercise are well-known. Despites this, a lot of people do not exrcise regularly. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to encourage them to exercise more often?

Many small businesses are being forced to close because they cannot compete with multinational corporations. What problems does this cause, and how can those problems be solved?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?