IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Many people are spending a lot of money on their weddings. Do you think this is a good thing?

#people #money #weddings
Marriage
 is a big event involving a
lot
 of
people
.Since the past, we see parents saving their hard-earned wages for their children's
marriages
.Invitations are given to everyone and they are expected to attend the
marriage
,bless the couple and have lunch.But spending too much
money
 on
weddings
 is not necessary.In
this
 essay , we will discuss the disadvantages of expending a
lot
 of
money
 on
weddings
. We see parents saving their capital for
weddings
 rather than saving for the studies of their kids.
This
 is especially in the case of girls.
For instance
,in India girl education is neglected while giving utmost preference to
marriage
.
Although
 globalisation has spread across the countries,in India we see families giving more importance to a girl's
marriage
.They feel it's futile for a girl to study.But
this
 attitude can be changed by conducting campaigns to spread awareness among
people
 about education.
Also
,a
lot
 of food is wasted in
marriages
.We see a
lot
 of
people
 going to bed with empty stomachs due to poverty.
For example
 in India, we witness almost every wedding has a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
 food wastage and anyone don't care about it.We
also
 come across cases where
people
 borrow
money
 for
weddings
.In the course of time,some will be able to pay the amount while others are unable.The ones who are unable to pay spend sleepless nights. In my opinion,
marriage
 should be planned as simple as possible inviting only close relatives and close friends.A
marriage
 must be carefully planned. To conclude,
people
 must not spend too much on their
marriages
instead
 they must spend
this
money
 on useful things like education.We can't tell
people
 to stop
marriages
 but we can encourage them to plan a simple wedding.If they wish they can have a grand reception.
Submitted by rameshchanndra801 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: