IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that the best way to make road transport safer is to make vehicle drivers take a driving test every year. Agree or disagree

#people #road #transport #vehicle #drivers #test #year
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a controversial idea heating a debate over whether forcing drivers to retake a driving evaluation yearly is an optimal method to turn
road
Use synonyms
 transport into a safer place. While
this
Linking Words
 thinking is valid to some extent, I would contend that
this
Linking Words
 trend may hardly become the most efficient solution. It is indisputable that the main culprit that makes
road
Use synonyms
 transport full
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 uncertainties hazardous is the citizen’s unconsciousness despite their hostile knowledge about the law on
road
Use synonyms
. Apparently, by taking driving exams on a yearly basis, people can have a chance to check their eyesight in order to avoid any traffic accidents that can be triggered by poor eyesight.
Likewise
Linking Words
, their horizons can
also
Linking Words
 be broadened by learning thoroughly through those laws or some traffic signs.
However
Linking Words
, those dangerous occurrences can still take place on a daily basis which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 primarily caused by the intention to break the regulations of the
road
Use synonyms
 users, not by not perceiving it.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is reasonable to admit the high chance of
road
Use synonyms
 accidents notwithstanding the yearly driving exams. While the aforementioned features are widely acknowledged, it is undeniable that there are a wide variety of other causes that make transport on the street extremely threatening.
In particular
Linking Words
, slippery or inadequate roads are
also
Linking Words
 one of the major reasons. By driving on
such
Linking Words
low quality
Add a hyphen
low-quality
show examples
 roadways which are usually full of potholes or barriers, the driver is more likely to be in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
liability of accident regardless of their firm grasp of laws. Take Vietnam as a prime example, where roads’ quality
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 generally dreadful, especially in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural area, the indigenous people are suffering from falling off their motorcycle because of enormous potholes.
Therefore
Linking Words
, other factors may
also
Linking Words
 contribute to the lack of safety while driving on the street. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 a yearly driving test is
Change the article
a justification
show examples
justification
Replace the word
just
show examples
 to some extent, I believe that there is a frenzy of other logical ways to solve the problems since other aspects
also
Linking Words
 make transportation dangerous.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: