IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

It is impossible to help all people in the world, so governments should only focus on people in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #world #governments #focus #countries
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There are an enormous population of
people
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 in the world and it is difficult and impossible to help all the poor population on Earth. Numerous governments can not help other
countries
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 and they have to focus on their own
people
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 and
countries
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.
To begin
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 with, there are numerous poor
countries
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 in the world and
that is
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 impossible for the international union organisation to help all of them.
Therefore
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, it is a duty to developed and developing
countries
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 to pay money to that poor
countries
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 for helping their
people
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.
In addition
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, the national governments have approaches to help their
people
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 rather than other
countries
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. In point of my view, I disagree with
this
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 reason. I suppose each
people
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 from each
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countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
 when need
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
help, all of the humans must help them immediately.
For instance
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 in African
countries
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, we can see the poverty and extended poor situations between their
people
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. The united states of America and some other developed
countries
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 are helping them to expand charities to help their
people
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.
For example
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, in ,Uganda they built an international charity to extend their schools and help their girls to progress their situation.
Secondly
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, It is possible for all
countries
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 to build an international bank to receive money to help poor
countries
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. Whereas some wealthy
countries
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such
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 as the USA and Qatar and some European's
countries
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 can improve the unstable situations in their
countries
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. To conclude
this
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 essay, the International Union organisation can get taxes from rich
countries
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 for paying loans to poor
countries
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 and each government will be improved when has a program and timetable for improving the level of
people
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's life. It depends on their future decisions.
Submitted by poorzamani_zp on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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