IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Many people prefer to spend the money they get rather than save it for their future. What are the reasons? Is this positive or negative development?

#people #money #future #development
Modern people would like to lavish wealth on extravagance rather than reserving it for future needs. While there are numerous reasons for the luxurious phenomenon, I would argue that
this
 trend indeed has adverse consequences. Many individuals tend to buy goods impulsively for two principal reasons.
Firstly
, they believe extravagant items are perhaps an excellent way to indicate their affluence. Significantly, the marketing industry enchants its customers by linking products with intellectual and wealthy influencers. On social media, like Facebook, numerous rich kids show up their high-tech iPhones and the latest fashions, in order to create an illusion of their happiness.
Secondly
, in contemporary society, several adults squander money for relaxation purposes due to their exhausting workload. It is noticeable that adults enjoy their evenings by shopping or indulging in fancy dining, which helps them energise after a long day at work. On the one hand, the consumption society effectively boosts the economy. A wide range of goods are required, so numerous jobs are created.
On the other hand
, impulsive purchases would result in disenchantment among the community, particularly youngsters who are target consumers of the marketing industry. Today’s youth waste money on goods and games which they think would potentially bring them happiness;
however
, many cases fail to fulfil their dream.
Moreover
, children might form a habit of passively consuming everything, similar to how they saw parents spending wealth in their formative years. In conclusion,
although
 several factors contribute to the lavish lifestyle, I believe
this
 tendency is an indisputably negative development for personal fulfilment matters.
Submitted by tieubangu67 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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