Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feels that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some
people
tend to believe that physical activities are the main feature of
health
whereas
others seem to argue that eating balanced is more crucial. To a large extent, I agree that exercise has an important role in
health
.
However
, there are some factors to be taken into consideration before making
this
judgement between doing sport and having a balanced diet. The following paragraphs will outline the argument for exercise and eating healthy.
First,
exercise can help
people
to keep fit. As a short-term benefit, a suitable
amount
of physical
activities
Fix the agreement mistake
activity
show examples
,
such
as 30 minutes per day for adults, can help keep our weight at a healthy level.
Moreover
, sports can reduce the risk of many diseases,
for instance
, heart attack and heart disease.
While
doing physical activities,
for example
, jogging and playing basketball, have the effect of losing weight, which decreases the
amount
of fat, they can keep our whole body in a more healthy situation. In short, doing a suitable
amount
of sport does not only help us to keep fit but
also
prevent diseases.
However
, to a small extent, having a balanced diet is more important depending on the absorption of ingredients
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
our body. For some intakes,
for example
, sugar and saturated fat, which contain excess amounts in fast food and junk food, they are hard to
be burned
Wrong verb form
burn
show examples
out if
people
only do 30-minute workouts per day. In
this
case, controlling the type of food is
also
an element
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
health
that has an influential impact. In conclusion,
while
doing a workout seems to be a very important element to
health
on the ground that it keeps
people
fit and
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
the risk of getting diseases, the seriousness of eating cannot be overlooked. To fully maximize our body condition, we need to focus on doing an appropriate
amount
of workouts, but
also
take care of our eating habits.
Submitted by dorischy124 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Good job in presenting both views. Make sure to clearly state your own opinion on which is more important at the end of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Overall, the essay has good coherence and cohesion with a logical structure. Make sure to use transition words to connect ideas more effectively.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cardiovascular health
  • Metabolism
  • Chronic diseases
  • Immune system
  • Mental well-being
  • Nutrients
  • Malnutrition
  • Obesity
  • Type 2 diabetes
  • Circulation
  • Nutrient distribution
  • Preventive health
  • Energy levels
  • Balanced diet
  • Essential nutrients
What to do next:
Look at other essays: