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Band 5

Some people believe that a country will benefit greatly if its students study abroad. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #country #benefit #students #study
There is a controversial notion heating a debate over the benefits of a nation. A school of thought claims that the national prosperity will be improved if their potential
students
studying
Wrong verb form
study
show examples
 abroad.
Although
this
 idea is valid to some certain extent, I do not totally agree with it.
Obviouly
Correct your spelling
Obviously
, there is
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
eclectic mix
merit
Change preposition
of merit
show examples
 of
students
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 abroad. It is undisputed that studying abroad may do wonders for not only
students
 but
also
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
national prosperity. Interestingly, there are many reputed schools
locateds
Correct your spelling
located
 in America, the UK or the other developing countries where spring
students
 can pursue their learning journey to absorb the higher quality education system. Because of going abroad to
study
, these
students
 can not only learn theoretical knowledge but
also
 have more opportunities to horn their set of soft skills which may act as a precursor for their future careers. After finishing their
study
, they will
Correct your spelling
come back
show examples
comeback
Correct your spelling
come back
show examples
 to their hometown and give a great contribution to their nation.
Therefore
, going abroad is a great way for
students
 to bring benefits to their own countries.
Nevertheless
, there are many drawbacks of going overseas to
study
. Evidently, there are a lot of
students
 who will not take any responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 improving their nations after a while of studying abroad.
For example
, there is an overwhelming proportion of Vietnamese
students
 who go abroad to widen their awareness.
However
, after a few years
staying
Change preposition
of staying
show examples
 in these wealthier nations, they decide to settle in these countries
Correct your spelling
instead
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in stead
Correct your spelling
instead
show examples
 of coming back to their hometown because of the higher salary payment and the luxury living standard
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there.
Hence
, going abroad to
study
 can not bring any merits for nations in
this
 case. To sum up,
although
 going to the other country to learn seems a great way for aspiring
students
 to contribute to their nation.
However
, the government should find
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 more suitable solution for these lingering problems to avoid the brain drain.
Submitted by thuhuong3031999 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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