Fewer and fewer people walk on a daily basis. What are the reasons and how to encourage them to spend their time walking?

this

technological era, taking daily steps is one of those points that are not considered as much as they should be. There are many reasons behind

this

issue but some actions can still be done to address

this

phenomenon which will be discussed

this

essay.

First

of all, the most significant reason would be the new lifestyle of

people

which leads them to become more immobile than in past. As a matter of fact, the world that we live in has persuaded us to

work

in front of a desk for hours.

For example

, recent research has been conducted by American scientists which explain about 80 per cent of jobs have not any motion and they are being done just by an implement like computers.

Secondly

, the limitation of time is another obstacle that stuck humans in

this

issue.

For instance

, these days,

people

work

for 9 and 10 hours a day approximately, they are not enough time to allocate some extra activities like walking. Regardless of what has been discussed, individuals are not acquainted with the importance of daily movement even for 20 or 30 minutes in a day. If

people

know about the advantages, definitely, they will not miss even one day of it. Being fit is one of those motivations which help

people

to find out they can lose calories throughout

this

process.

For example

, walking from home to

work

or even parking their car a little far from

work

help them to take their steps for even 30 minutes without special planning. Another incentive thing would be the awareness of balancing some factors of health,

for example

, decreasing the risk of heart attacks or level of cholesterol especially in older ages can push

people

this

case. In conclusion, the structure of the human’s body is not formed for

this

sort of lifestyle, we should move and be active daily, I am

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

opinion that even we have no time to exercise or go to the gym, at least there are some slight things to alleviate

this

phenomenon.

Submitted by s_bokaee on Mon Nov 08 2021

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

346 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fewer and fewer people walk on a daily basis. What are the reasons and how to encourage them to spend their time walking?

Your opinion

Traffic jams are prevalent in many cities. What problems does it cause? What are the solutions?

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The government's investment in arts, music, and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Write at least 250 words

Full-time university students spend a lot of time studying. Some say they should do other activities too. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?