Some people think that government should not give international aid since they have disadvantaged people like unemployed and homeless in their own country. To what extent do u you agree or disagree?

The
Correct article usage
Society
show examples
society
feel
Change the verb form
feels
show examples
that the
state
should not participate in international
aid
since their own
country
has
dimerited
Correct your spelling
dimerized
merited
people
for instance
unemployed and homeless
therefore
it is imperative to consider our own
people
as
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will elaborate
inmy
Correct your spelling
in my
essay
Firstly
,the
state
is
madated
Correct your spelling
mandated
to take the responsibility of
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own citizens to ensure they have basic needs through creating employment
however
,
currenlty
Correct your spelling
currently
the lack of unemployment and homeless
people
is the most trending challenge in the
society
where the
state
has not factored in bringing any solution.
Inaddition
Correct your spelling
In addition
,
this
has resulted
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
criminal activities in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
such
that
people
are
bieng
Correct your spelling
being
mugged in broad
Correct your spelling
daylight
show examples
day light
Correct your spelling
daylight
show examples
.
Secondly
,it is indispensable for the
state
to support the unemployed and homeless since it
also
pray
Change the verb form
prays
show examples
a role in
buliding
Correct your spelling
building
the economy
such
that the
country
revenue would increase.
For example
in Rwanda,the
state
has
priotised
Correct your spelling
prioritised
in creating jobs
such
that the
country
has the highest revenue collection.For
this
reason
Add a comma
,reason
show examples
the
state
needs to create jobs for its own
people
rather before participating in international
aid
However
,it is
prerequisite
Correct article usage
a prerequisite
show examples
for the
country
to join hands together with other countries in the international
aid
for
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
reputation.
Moreover
, it
create
Change the verb form
creates
show examples
a good rapport for the purpose of businesses
such
that good relationship create a good
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
for export and import.
On the other hand
, every
country
has different challenges whereby it cannot
relie
Correct your spelling
rely
relied
relies
on
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own
therefore
by participating in
such
aids create an environment to be supported when
need
Add an article
the need
show examples
arises.For
this
reason
Add a comma
,reason
show examples
as much as the
state
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
to support
unemployed
Correct article usage
the unemployed
show examples
and homeless it cannot run away from international
aid
as it has an impact.
Inconclusion
Correct your spelling
In conclusion
show examples
,the
state
economy can be improved by creating employment
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
society
however
as they participate in international
aid
for
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
reputation.
Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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