IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

1- Parents should take courses in parenting in order to improve the lives of their children. To what extent do you agree

#parents #courses #lives #children
The lives of
children
 are being nurtured by
parents
,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
 the education of parenting has to be done by
parents
 ,
Also
 they need to teach good lessons, morals and ethics etc. to their
children
 in contemplation of recognizing the worth of a person, people and humanity.
This
 essay will discuss why the cradling of
kids
 is important. In some cities, there is various kinds of upbringing way adolescent like
parents
 have to take care of their teenagers because toddlers need to provide proper hospitality for better development in their childhood days.
Also
 some countries, France gave fathers of newborn babies training of fatherhood and developed their mindset respectively, to enhance their future improvisation. The little age of many
kids
 needs to maintain their hygiene, safety, growth etc. Many guardians have the potential to manage their work-life balance and raise their cherubs.
However
, many
parents
 are unable to manage the nurturing of babies.
Therefore
, the
parents
 have to attend the parenting route in order to increase the skills, patience, pampering
kids
, discipline etc. Training is given to
parents
 for all phases of
children
's lives, how to tackle all the problems and work which they need in the proper development of their legacies. There are mainly four types of parenting Authoritarian or Disciplinarian, permissive or Indulgent, uninvolved and authoritative. In conclusion, I would suggest every parent must involve in training which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 beneficial related to nourishing, development of raising
children
, in order to be happy in life with their
kids
. Every child has the ability to adapt easily
anything
Change preposition
to anything
show examples
 in their childhood which is given by their
parents
.
Submitted by manishazar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: