Many parents these day work in other countries, taking their family with them. Do you think advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

Opportunities to work abroad are more today than in the past, many

people

are grasping these chances. They are working in foreign with their family. In my opinion, I considered that working aborad with a family has both positives and negatives impact on individually. There are several reasons why many

people

prefer doing a job in other countries with a family. The

first

and foremost important thing is that the family relationship can not be weakened by long -distance.

For example

Change preposition

in a

show examples

survey has conducted in the UK, there are 70% of

people

may have divorced every year because of long-distance relationships.

Furthermore

, persons can not feel loneliness and homesickness when they are with their family.

Hence

, taking a family with them can have more benefits. Another point to consider working with a family abroad is

also

beneficial for the

children

. The

children

who are

Change preposition

show examples

young ages

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

need

love

and care from both parents.

For instance

, In India, more parents leave their

children

with their grandparents when they are going to work foreign,

children

are deprived of their parent's

love

Moreover

, childhood is a crucial phase of life and comes only once. If

children

will not get one parent

love

it may have a considerable impact on their psyche.

Therefore

, working in

other country

Change the wording

another country

other countries

show examples

with a family can provide complete

love

and care to the

children

On the other hand

, there are some problems working abroad with family.

Firstly

people

have to share a house with others because living abroad in a personal house is more expensive.

In addition

, it is easy for a single person to share an apartment with someone, but a family needs a proper house.

secondly

, parents feel culture shock and

therefore

they can not help their

children

. In the conclusion, making a decision to live with a family abroad can lead to more advantages, but

people

should not neglect some drawbacks of living with the family while working abroad

Submitted by patelpayal8296 on Sun Nov 14 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

325 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many parents these day work in other countries, taking their family with them. Do you think advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

At some locations an increase in the production of consumer good results in damage of our natural environment. What are the causes and solution ?

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Many people today are worried about the large quantities of waste produced by ordinary households. What problems are caused by household waste, and what solutions may be possible in both the short and the long term?