IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

🔶The maps below shows the town of Lynnfield in 1936 and then later in 2007. 🔸Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (The photo is in the next post.)

🔶The maps below shows the town of Lynnfield in 1936 and then later in 2007. 🔸Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (The photo is in the next post.)
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A glance at the maps provided reveals the developmental changes which took place in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Lynnfield
town
Use synonyms
 during the period from 1936 until 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, a comparison of the two maps illustrates a significant transformation in
this
Linking Words
 city. As shown in the figure, in the year 1936 there was a river in the northeast of the
town
Use synonyms
, but during the
next
Linking Words
 following years, it was completely altered
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 an enormous residential district.
Moreover
Linking Words
, with regard to the two maps, the travel agency was replaced by a florist in the vicinity of the bank
as well as
Linking Words
 a shopping centre was constructed in the vacant region in the centre of
town
Use synonyms
 in 2007.
In contrast
Linking Words
, during the period
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1936 until 2007, the farmland was cleared totally and converted into the golf course which was located in the southeastern of
this
Linking Words
 city.
Further
Linking Words
 developments were the building of government offices
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 changed to the museum which was situated in
next
Linking Words
 to the golf course
as well as
Linking Words
 the cycling route in the southwest of the
town
Use synonyms
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 a road for commuting of residents.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "as well as, next".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words town with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 3 times.
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