Some education systems make students focus on certain subjects at the age of 15, while others require students to study a wide range of subjects until they leave school. What are the benefits of each system? Which do you think is a better education system?

In
this
day and age, education systems for learners have never failed to provoke debates. While some claim that
students
should concentrate on certain fields when they are 15, the opposite makes a statement that pupils are made to attend a myriad of
subjects
until they graduate. I would contend that each method has its own merits,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
the former is better as learners have more time for other activities desired. It is undeniable that studying a variety of
subjects
may help learners gain a firm foundation of different natural and social concepts.
This
will enable them to have a multi-dimensional outlook on life and solve problems in numerous fields.
For example
, in Vietnam,
students
studying engineering courses are only required to have good grades in natural
subjects
like Maths and Physics.
However
, it would be more beneficial for them to study English to make a competitive edge when they apply for a job in a company.
On the other hand
,
students
who concentrate on only a few
subjects
have more time for other purposes than those studying so many.
For instance
, they can be allowed to choose the
subjects
they yearn for and put more dedication into studying in lieu of focusing on
subjects
they are not interested in.
As a result
, they could save time and energy to build a firm foundation with a view to land a job and move up a career ladder more easily. In conclusion,
instead
of studying a wealth of
subjects
until they leave school,
students
can derive more benefits from special curriculums at the age of 15 which are useful for their future career path.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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