Some people say that music is good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together? To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #music #cultures #ages

Nowadays,

people

have different views about

music

playing a significant role in bringing individuals of various

cultures

and

ages

together or not. I think

although

, it seems that musical way is considered the significant thing to get population together, it is unimportant way collecting

people

together who have not same

cultures

and

ages

. On the one hand, there is no musical language for anyone so that

people

of every country can listen to any

music

, which the lyrics are not understanding for everyone. Most importantly, listening to

music

is unlimited in order that

people

can gain some knowledge and broaden their horizons by listening to different types of country

music

For example

, if a person listens to the “Mugam” that national

music

kind of Azerbaijan,

this

person will be aware of the culture of Azerbaijan. Listening to

music

is not only a good way for getting

people

of different

cultures

but

also

ages

together.

Consequently

, listening to

music

is vitally necessary for individuals and it brings

people

to the same thinking whose

cultures

and

ages

are different.

On the other hand

, other types of countries have different

cultures

and between older citizens and youngsters have huge musical differences and because of these reasons to listening to the

music

is not considered a vital role for bringing society together.

This

means that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

most of the time older

people

have a tendency to listen to slow

music

such

as classic or retro,

nevertheless

young

people

are accustomed to listening to active

music

like rock, jazz or rap.

For example

, if a character prefers to listen to classic

music

as a

result

Add the comma(s)

,result

show examples

it will be difficult to get together other persons who tend to listen to rap

music

. In conclusion, I believe even though melody plays a crucial role in the life of

people

to bring them to the same opinion whose art and

ages

are different, it is still substantial and undeniable by listening to

music

a body cannot get the same thinking.

Submitted by faridqahramanov7 on Tue Nov 16 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

331 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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