IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Stress related illness are becoming increasingly common. What are the causes and suggest solutions.

#stress #illness
It has utterly been claimed that health problems related to
stress
 are growing among many
people
 in today's world. The objective of
this
 essay is to investigate the factors which have contributed to
this
 issue and point out a number of means to solve the situation. There are certain reasons why the number of
people
 who suffer from many diseases related to
stress
 is rising these days. The
first
 and foremost of them is obtaining a high standard of living. To illustrate, many
people
 aspire to raise their job's rank and earn more money for their families luxury.
This
 makes their concern about their achievements accelerates dramatically over time which affects them negatively to be more exposed to some
stress
 diseases. The
second
 reason is, the increasing demands of
life
.
In other words
, overpopulation is accompanied by necessities that have no balance with
people
 earnings.
For instance
, many families who received a monthly fixed salary struggle with expenses of
life
 which increase rapidly
such
 as bills, taxes, and even the prices of daily needs.
As a result
,
this
 unbalance of individual gains and
life
 demands drives up the rate of sicknesses that are relevant to
stress
.
However
, there are a variety of viable solutions at hand to address
this
 problem. The most significant one of these solutions is the measures that authorities should move to implement. The
first
 procedure that should be taken is putting restrictions on the long- working hours.
This
 will lead
people
 to get some time with their families which prevent the
stress
 of working alone for a long time.
Secondly
, control the prices of
life
 necessities which enable
people
 to take a breathe and enhance their psychological health. To sum up, according to some
people
's ambition and rising of
life
's necessities demands many are suffering from several diseases that related directly to the
stress
. Elaborate procedures by authorities need to be taken to prevent
this
 problem from deteriorating
further
.
Submitted by semoosamasemoo6 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • stress-related illnesses
  • rapid pace
  • pressure
  • balance
  • omnipresent
  • information overload
  • disconnect
  • economic uncertainties
  • job insecurity
  • financial stress
  • environmental factors
  • chronic stress
  • work-life balance
  • flexible working hours
  • mental health
  • support programs
  • physical activity
  • healthy eating habits
  • awareness
  • accessibility
  • counseling
  • stress management
  • community environment
  • reconnect with nature
What to do next:
Look at other essays: