IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

With access to the internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should thus limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree or disagree?

#access #internet #media #websites #children #situations #adults #limit
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In the past,
kids
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 used to play outdoor games in their free time, which indeed used to keep the kid active physically and mentally
both
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apply
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, but in today's
time
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,time
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 social media and easy
internet
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access
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has
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have
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 taken place of outdoor
play time
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playtime
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 of the
kids
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 and diverting their childhood to the dangerous and mature
content
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 available on
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internet
Add an article
the internet
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 these days.
Hence
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, I strongly agree with the point that we should limit
the
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apply
show examples
access
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 to the
internet
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 for our
child
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children
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. Low
internet
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 cost, attractive network plans and high availability of mobile network
has
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have
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 increased
an
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apply
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easy
access
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 to
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internet
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the internet
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 almost everywhere and to everyone. The
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smartphones
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smart phones
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smartphones
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 available in
market
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the market
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in
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at
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very
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a very
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 low cost is making
it
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them
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 even more affordable and
accessable
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accessible
. Now are days
kids
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 are finding social media
websites
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 and networking sites more attractive because of the
irrelevent
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irrelevant
 and inappropriate
content
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 available on
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internet
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the internet
show examples
 , which
sometime
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sometimes
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 can put
kids
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 in
dangerous
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a dangerous
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situation
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situations
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. Various gaming apps like pubg etc. are having violent
content
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, which leaves
very
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a very
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 bad impact on youngsters
mind
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minds
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 and making them violent. In my opinion, we cannot stop people or the
websites
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 owner to publish irrelevant
content
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 on their
websites
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 and social networking sites, but can definitely stop our
kids
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 to have limited
access
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 or only have
access
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 to
the
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apply
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age appropriate
Add a hyphen
age-appropriate
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content
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. We can have
childlock
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child lock
child-lock
 on various apps
in
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on
show examples
 our phones and can educate them to understand good or
the
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apply
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bad
content
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 available on
websites
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.
Also
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 can make them understand the consequences of having
acccess
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access
 to
irrelevent
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irrelevant
content
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 and can encourage our
kids
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 to go out for outdoor games,
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instead
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ofinstead
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to
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of
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 giving them
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smartphones
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smart phones
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smartphones
show examples
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • dangerous situations
  • limit access to the internet
  • inappropriate content
  • online predators
  • physical and mental health
  • monitoring and guiding
  • online safety
  • school curriculum
What to do next:
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