Some people believe that celebrating personal events is a waste of money. Others feel that these celebrations play an important role in the lives of individuals and in society as a whole. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #events #waste #money #celebrations #role #lives #individuals #society

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Celebrating personal occasions

such

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as birthdays and marriage anniversaries are just a waste of

money

Use synonyms

some

people

Use synonyms

claim, others,

however

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, consider

such

Linking Words

occasions do have both personal and social advantages. The way I see it myself

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is that it has a positive impact on persons and on societies. On one hand , the opponents defend their proposition by pointing out families priorities since there are bills

had

Correct pronoun usage

that had

show examples

to be paid starting with the hydro and

electricitiy

Correct your spelling

electricity

and not ending with children's college fees.

Thus

Linking Words

, it does not make sense to spend more

money

Use synonyms

on a birthday party or an anniversary while there are more essential financial demands had to be accomplished.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, life is becoming more demandable and everybody had to save some

money

Use synonyms

for retirement , as they pretend.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, many

people

Use synonyms

however

Linking Words

, have a totally different point of view where every person has the right to enjoy a cheerful break away from the stress of long working hours ,

also

Linking Words

to get rid of the daily boring routine. Eventually, these individuals are going

Fix the infinitive

to be

show examples

more focused on their job resulting in increasing productivity

Change preposition

show examples

the end. So,

such

Linking Words

parties boost

people

Use synonyms

's professional life and

this

Linking Words

in turn

Add the comma(s)

, in turn,

show examples

reflects positively on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society in general. A European study showed that cheerful events held either at home or at

workplace

Correct article usage

the workplace

show examples

have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

remarkablly

Correct your spelling

remarkably

remarkable

positive health consequences and on individuals' productivity and punctuality. To sum up,

although

Linking Words

it might be considered by some

people

Use synonyms

to be an unreasonable way to spend

money

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, celebrating personal occasions have many positive outcomes it

improve

Change the verb form

improves

show examples

individual's professional skills

eventuallly

Correct your spelling

eventually

contribute to social prosperity.

Submitted by mkhmd68 on Thu Nov 18 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

lavish parties
essential expenditures
financial stress
lasting memories
social bonds
emotional support
familial and social ties
mental health
community cohesion
cultural heritage
sense of identity
traditional practices
sense of belonging
continuity
unique cultural aspects
personal well-being
routine
life satisfaction
reasonable budget
cost-effective
potluck parties

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Some people believe that celebrating personal events is a waste of money. Others feel that these celebrations play an important role in the lives of individuals and in society as a whole. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

You saw an advert in the newspaper asking for volunteers to help run a chartiy event Write a letter of application to the organizers. In your letter: Explain why you are interested in helpin Give details of suitable past experience suggest ways you might help with the event.

Some people assume that long distance relationships never work. What are the reasons and what could be the solutions?

.In many countries, the number of people suffering from stress is increasing. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to tackle it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.