IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

People who travel to another country to live, work or study for a period of time often suffer badly from homesickness. Why is it? What are the best ways to reduce this problem?

Once in a lifetime, some
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people might have gone away from their home town
in
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for
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 many miles for some reasons
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such
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, such
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 as work or study.
As a result
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, during the first period of time, some of them might have experienced a bad
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
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 of
homesick
Replace the word
homesickness
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.
This
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 essay will discuss the main reasons for
this
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 problem and express some possible solutions to avoid it.
To begin
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 with, when a human being has to do something
that is
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 unfamiliar to them, their subconscious fear would try to process everything. In
this
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 case, travelling somewhere far away, it is not unusual that people would feel afraid or overthink about it.
Furthermore
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, every country has its own uniqueness
,
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;
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therefore
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, they are all different
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such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as cuisines, cultures, and lifestyles.
Consequently
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, homesickness is a feeling of things we used to attach to
but
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, but
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 we can not have
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 anymore. Some possible answers to
this
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 problem are adjusting our own thoughts and trying to make technology
become
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apply
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useful. First of all, whenever we feel attachment, we have to not think about it. Mindset is an essential part of us as it controls everything. If we think something negatively, our actions or thoughts would
also
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 turn out to be terrible
as well
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apply
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.
Secondly
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, with advanced technology, we can use the internet to do everything we want.
For example
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, if we miss someone in our hometown, we can make a video call to them. With these two ways, going somewhere far away would not be a problem for anyone anymore.
To sum up
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, it is very common to have a homesick feeling when most
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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people have to travel
in
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apply
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some
distances
Punctuation problem
distances,
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 as it is not
a thing
Use the right word
something
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 we often do and the differences in the way of living.
However
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, we can significantly lessen
this
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 kind of thought by changing our mindset and learning how to gain benefits from technology.

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task response
Be sure to answer the asked parts: why homesick happens and the best ways to cut it. Give clear, main ideas.
coherence
Make one plan: intro, two body parts on causes and ways, and short end. Use one idea in each paragraph and link with 'and', 'but', or 'also'.
grammar
Use simple, clear grammar. Check small mistakes like 'home town' and 'homesick' form. Try shorter sentences.
lexis
Keep words from easy list. Do not use long hard words. Use easy words like 'feel', 'move', 'plan', 'help' again and again.
examples
Give more real examples to show your point. For example, talk about life at a new school, or a new job, or a trip away.
structure
Watch the length and flow. Add a short end that sums up what to do.
idea
The idea is clear: homesickness comes from new place and new life.
idea
You show a plan to use online talk to help, which is good.
structure
There is an ending that wraps up.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • homesick
  • homesickness
  • country
  • move
  • live
  • work
  • study
  • feel
  • sad
  • miss
  • family
  • friends
  • language
  • culture
  • home
  • adapt
  • adjust
  • routine
  • plan
  • help
  • support
  • group
  • club
  • friend
  • talk
  • listen
  • learn
  • speak
  • local
  • new
  • different
  • easy
  • difficult
  • visit
  • cook
  • food
  • city
  • campus
  • worry
  • stress
What to do next:
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