IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country Task DISCUSES BOTH GROUP AND SAY YOUR IDEA

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Some
individuals
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 argue in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
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 of mandatory
work
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 in a specific study location ,
While
Linking Words
 some
individuals
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 champion the freedom for people to
work
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 in various
countries
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. Personally, I align with the latter perspective There is a prevailing belief among certain
individuals
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 that engaging in
work
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 opportunities abroad can directly impact our professional development. Proponents of
this
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 viewpoint assert that through
such
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 experiences,
individuals
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 can enhance their skills, broaden their knowledge, and foster a global perspective. To illustrate
this
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, let's take the example of a doctor. If a doctor were to relocate to a
country
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 with a highly sophisticated healthcare system, they would reap the benefits of improved problem-solving abilities, enabling them to effectively diagnose and provide optimal treatments for their patients.
Moreover
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, they believe that Working in other
countries
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 indeed offers excellent opportunities to collaborate with
individuals
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 from diverse backgrounds. Whether it's developing new treatments, improving infrastructure conditions, or tackling various challenges, the collaboration between people from different backgrounds fosters innovation and promotes a broader understanding of global issues. I firmly believe that working in other
countries
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 offers a significant advantage when it comes to effectively addressing skill gaps. In today's global landscape, numerous
countries
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 are grappling with the challenge of finding skilled
professionals
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 in certain sectors.
This
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 problem is particularly pronounced in developing nations. Allowing trained doctors or engineers to
work
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 in other
countries
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 plays a crucial role in bridging these skill gaps. It has the potential to greatly enhance service provision, bolster infrastructure, and contribute to the holistic development of a nation.
Furthermore
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, I firmly advocate for the right of
professionals
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 to seek career opportunities and personal growth in the places where they believe they can have the greatest impact. When
individuals
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 are fulfilled with their surroundings, it sparks their motivation and propels them towards constant self-improvement. There is a viewpoint that advocates for mandatory
work
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 in the
country
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 where
professionals
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 receive their training.
This
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 approach argues that
such
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 a requirement enables the
country
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 to recoup its investment by obligating
professionals
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 to serve in underserved areas or regions with a shortage of skilled workers before they are permitted to
work
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elsewhere
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.
However
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, I strongly disagree with
this
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 perspective. In fact, I firmly believe that working in other
countries
Use synonyms
 not only offers the potential for reinvesting in one's home
country
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 but
also
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 stimulates innovation and fosters creativity. In conclusion, encouraging the freedom to
work
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 in foreign
countries
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 not only fosters professional development but
also
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 empowers
individuals
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 to exercise their personal choices
while
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 effectively bridging skill gaps.

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear logical structure, well-defined paragraphs, and an effective use of transitions. To further improve, aim to vary your sentence structures and include more sophisticated linking words to enhance flow and coherence.
task achievement
You've effectively responded to all parts of the task, providing a balanced discussion and a clear personal opinion. Consider integrating more detailed examples and a wider range of arguments to strengthen your task response.
task achievement
The essay successfully engages with both viewpoints and articulates a clear personal stance, effectively addressing the essay task.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, framing the essay topic and your stance clearly.
coherence cohesion
You used examples effectively to support your points, which enhances your argument's persuasiveness.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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