IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. DO the advanatges of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#experts #children #language #school #advanatges #outweigh
In my
country
 people
useing
Correct your spelling
using
 many
lenguage
Correct your spelling
language
languages
 because some countries living people relative in
defrent
Correct your spelling
different
defrent
Correct your spelling
different
deferent
resion
Correct your spelling
region
 and they use many
language
Change to a plural noun
languages
show examples
in my opinion
Add the comma(s)
, in my opinion,
show examples
 I consider that it has only advantages
this
 statement  Some experts believe that it is good for children
to begin
 learning
a
Change the article
the
show examples
other
Change the wording
another language
other languages
show examples
language
 at primary school rather than
secondary
Add an article
a secondary
show examples
 school because
this
 way is good for future and to many advantages learning
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
 at school like
thay
Correct your spelling
they
that
 way increasing the study
lavel
Correct your spelling
level
 in
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
 because children learning
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
 in own
country
 and they would more prefer in job foreign
companys
Correct your spelling
company
companies
 in own
country
 because now more than
country
 build
companys
Correct your spelling
company
companies
 in
defrent
Correct your spelling
different
defrent
Correct your spelling
different
deferent
cityes
Correct your spelling
cities
 and they should more require employers with knowledge about foreign
language
 and children gaining more confidence in future about
job
Add an article
the job
a job
show examples
 in foreign companies because they
aredy
Correct your spelling
are
already
larning
Correct your spelling
learning
 foreign
language
 As well as whole people like
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 and working other countries but they
not
Change the verb form
do not
did not
show examples
 understand in own
language
 and they face problems but they finished
language
 larna about schooling time and they would not face
this
typ
Correct your spelling
type
 problem.
Change preposition
On other
show examples
other hand
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
show examples
this
 way increasing the
fencial
Correct your spelling
financial
 and business in own
country
 because many
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
show examples
need
Add the particle
toneed
show examples
 build the company in my
country
 because they need educated employees about foreign
language
 In my
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 government should important mother tange
language
 in all schools because as well as
this
language
 is most important
Submitted by gsant95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: