In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message.

Nowadays, diverse ways of
children
's appropriate treatment are a controversial subject among parents. In some areas,
children
are taught that if they seriously strive for what they want they can acquire that.
Although
this
manner has some positive points for kids, it bears some potential drawbacks which should be taken into consideration; all of these points will be discussed in the following paragraphs. By passing down
such
message
Correct article usage
a message
show examples
to
children
, they will experience many benefits in their future as they have been induced they have strong abilities to tackle any problems and become successful in them.
In other words
, their sense of self-confidence—the feeling which is an essential factor in facing problems—will be boosted
thus
, they will be more ambitious to achieve their objectives and personal best.
Besides
, as they have learnt to practice adequately hard, they will gain more self-efficiency in the fields that they are occupying.
Therefore
, they will become a person who is more confident, practical and hardworking because they push themselves to the limits and take the challenges to achieve more victories in their lives.
This
message,
however
, can face
children
with some negative points which will have irreparable consequences. In the beginning, accomplishing some tasks
such
as being a professional singer or being an incredible dancer requires an intrinsic talent which is not available in everyone,
hence
even by making serious attempts,
such
accomplishments cannot be obtained; in
this
situation, people who have been persuaded by
such
notion will get a tough beaten.
Accordingly
, people will experience some mental disorders including anxiety, frustration, and eventually depression, the side effects which can cause demotivation, and aimlessness in their future lives. In conclusion, there is a perspective in some societies which explains to
children
that by making sufficient struggles, they can achieve what they desire. Conveying
such
attitude
Correct article usage
an attitude
show examples
to kids will benefit them in various areas like gaining more confidence in coping with issues,
while
it has
also
some disadvantages which can lead to some psychological problems in the future.
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task achievement
Expand with more relevant, specific examples to illustrate your points. This will provide greater clarity and strengthen the arguments presented.
task achievement
Some ideas, such as the psychological impacts of failure, could be explored in greater depth. Ensure that each point made is fully developed and supported.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures to make your writing more engaging. This can improve the overall flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Make the transitions between ideas and paragraphs smoother to enhance the logical flow. This will help readers follow your arguments more easily.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines the key points to be discussed, setting a strong foundation for your essay.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a good understanding of the advantages and disadvantages of the subject, showing a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed and reinforces the overall argument.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
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