IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries students are required to learn a foreign language but in other countries it is not necessary to do so. Discuss the benefits of each case and give your opinion.

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Pupils have to learn non-native
Use synonyms
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
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 in some countries
while
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 others
believed
Wrong verb form
believe
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 that they do not have to do
.
Rephrase
so.
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 In my opinion, I believe that
although
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 learning
Use synonyms
second
Add an article
a second
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language
Use synonyms
 can be beneficial to
further
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 opportunities,
overall
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 student must learn their mother
language
Use synonyms
 to possess it as a citizen. A growing body of
search
Fix the agreement mistake
searches
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suggest
Change the verb form
suggests
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 that 45
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
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 of students in high school like to choose
first
Correct article usage
a first
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language
Use synonyms
 class.
One
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 key benefit is that learning
native
Correct article usage
a native
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language
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 rather than a foreign can be best fundamental for handling
next
Correct article usage
the next
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one
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. It can
also
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 lead to cultural and national necessities. Taking Mongolia as an example, 87
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 of high school students can pass
Mongolian
Correct article usage
the Mongolian
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 exam, and their
second
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language
Use synonyms
 quality rate is
one
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 of the highest in Asia.
While
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possesing
Correct your spelling
possessing
 a
second
Use synonyms
language
Use synonyms
 can be a huge advantage for following chances,
it s
Correct your spelling
it's
 clear that dealing
how
Change preposition
with how
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 to use
native
Correct article usage
the native
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language
Use synonyms
 appropriately must not
leave
Wrong verb form
be left
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 behind.
However
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, there are
also
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 negative impacts which must be considered.
One
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 important issue is that it would be complicated
if
Correct word choice
apply
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they learn
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second
Correct article usage
a second
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language
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 after graduating
middle
Change preposition
from middle
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 school.
This
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 means that it decreases
Correct article usage
the possibilities
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possibilities
Fix the agreement mistake
possibility
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to pursue
Change preposition
of pursuing
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 undergraduate education
in
Change preposition
apply
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abroad.
For instance
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, A student who used to study a foreign
language
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 and native at the same time
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 could have
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
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 challenges than
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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 study a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 later on.
Although
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,
possesing
Correct your spelling
possessing
 a native
language
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 formerly might be better for cultural and national
dictinction
Correct your spelling
distinction
distinctions
, learning a foreign
latter
Correct your spelling
letter
show examples
 can bring pressures on
later
Add an article
the later
a later
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 path. In conclusion, it is illogical to learn a
second
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language
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while
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 learning
mother
Correct article usage
a mother
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language
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. To suggest that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 learning native
language
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 usage can make
easier
Correct pronoun usage
it easier
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 to
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
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following
Correct article usage
the following
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language
Use synonyms
 and better for nationality both society and scholars. I recommend that children should learn their native
language
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 formerly,
then
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 learn a
second
Use synonyms
language
Use synonyms
latterly
Rephrase
later
show examples
.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • broadening horizons
  • cognitive abilities
  • competitive edge
  • global economic opportunities
  • cultural understanding
  • empathy
  • academic burden
  • stress-free education
  • in-depth studies
  • advancements and innovation
  • balanced approach
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