Some people feel unsafe either staying at home or going out. What are the possible reasons for this? What can be done to address this issue?

#people #home #address

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Different strokes for different folks. In recent years, global safety rates

are

Wrong verb form

have been

show examples

observed to decline drastically to

Correct article usage

the

show examples

extent that

people

Use synonyms

now feel insecure wherever they are.

This

Linking Words

essay

shall intend

Wrong verb form

intends

show examples

to delve into the main reasons why folks feel unsafe either indoors or outdoors and some preventive measures to overcome

this

Linking Words

issue in the upcoming paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the obvious cause behind the fear of insecurity among the masses is the surge in the rate of crime. To explain it, as the proportion of unemployment increases, youngsters indulge in bad activities

such

Linking Words

as robbery,

theft

Correct word choice

and theft

show examples

in order to fulfil their dreams and all necessary things.

Consequently

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

inclines to a sense of serious threat in human minds.

For instance

Linking Words

, the crime rate in South Africa is so high that

people

Use synonyms

keep pistols all the time for their security.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the element of male dominance is still prominent among illiterate individuals,

this

Linking Words

is so-called gender equivalent society.

Due to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, illegal activities like sexual harassment and domestic violence

raises

Verb problem

arise

show examples

. To illustrate it, a recent survey

Change preposition

show examples

Oxford University revealed that case of rape occurs in only those countries where the percentage of uneducated teenagers are more.

However

Linking Words

, in order to mitigate

this

Linking Words

issue, the government should think out of the box and invent some new technologies to

decline

Verb problem

reduce

show examples

the problem of unemployment . They should give a chance to everyone to show their ability. So that the gap between rich and poor would be decreased.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the authorities should go the extra mile and provide free education

as well as

Linking Words

training.

Because with

Correct word choice

With

show examples

highly educated

people

Use synonyms

comes high thinking and

hence

Linking Words

folks will feel safe in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. To recapitulate, it can be seen that the lack of work opportunities

as well as

Linking Words

male dominance nature

along with

Linking Words

high

Replace the word

highly

show examples

literate

people

Use synonyms

in society are the most significant causes behind the insecurity. It is recommended that the organisation should invest in the newer employment area in an organised way so that everyone should have access to it.

Submitted by prabhjotkaur9520 on Sun Nov 21 2021

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task response

Ensure a clear and comprehensive response to the task, with relevant and specific examples.

coherence and cohesion

Work on the logical structure of the essay, and ensure a stronger presence of introduction and conclusion.

lexical resource

Expand and diversify the range of vocabulary used. Pay attention to word choice and accuracy.

grammatical range

Work on the accuracy of grammar and sentence structures. Avoid repetitive use of phrases and improve the variety of sentence structures.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

337 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Perceive
Threat
Crime
Fear
Accident
Natural disaster
Personal security
Trust
Authorities
Social isolation
Loneliness
Media
News coverage
Community safety measures
Personal security awareness
Transparency
Support networks
Community involvement

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Some people feel unsafe either staying at home or going out. What are the possible reasons for this? What can be done to address this issue?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

some people think that social media sites have a huge negative effect on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Famous sportsmen earn a lot more money than those in other professions. Although sport is important in our lives, everyone should be equal and such big incomes of sport professionals are unjustified. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Everyone should adopt a vegetarian diet because eating meat can cause serious health problems. Do you agree or disagree?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?