In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?

In recent years, the question of whether
children
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should begin formal schooling at an early
age
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has been widely debated.
While
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some contend that delaying formal
education
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until
age
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seven or eight is better for
children
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, others believe that beginning at four offers advantages.
This
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essay will discuss both perspectives and explain why I support the former viewpoint. On the one hand, I agree with those who advocate that delaying formal
education
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until
children
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are seven or eight is much better for their social and emotional development. Starting school at a later
age
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allows
children
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to acquire social skills and emotional resilience before encountering a rigid curriculum.
For example
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, unstructured free play, including drawing, puppet shows, and dress-up, can cultivate creativity, communication, and emotional regulation, which ultimately prepares
children
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for structured learning.
Therefore
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,
this
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approach enables young pupils to adapt to academic settings without exposing them to the pressure of schooling, which would be difficult for a four-year-old.
On the other hand
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, opponents argue that academic learning should begin at
age
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four to prepare
children
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for a competitive world. They point out that starting at four can give their offspring a head start and a competitive edge among their peers, improving their chances of obtaining higher-level positions in the future.
For instance
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, a 2020 study in Japan found that 76% of
children
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who had attended early schooling programs achieved stronger academic results, compared with only 24% of those who started later.
Furthermore
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, some parents insist on educating their offspring early because entering the workforce has become more difficult, requiring higher levels of
education
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.
To conclude
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,
although
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early schooling can provide a competitive advantage, I am convinced that delaying
education
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is more effective. When
children
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begin their
education
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at a later
age
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, they can not only develop emotional and social intelligence but
also
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cultivate basic life skills.

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task response
Give more proof for each main idea, and add one more clear example.
coherence
Use more link words like 'also', 'and', 'but' to join ideas smoothly.
coherence
Keep the order simple: state a point, give a reason, then one example.
language
Use plain words. Avoid hard or long phrases.
strength
Clear stance at the end.
strength
Good layout with clear parts.
strength
Uses example to back up points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • formal education
  • advisable
  • structured learning
  • academic skills
  • socialization
  • competitive edge
  • cognitive development
  • language acquisition
  • play-based learning
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • cognitive abilities
  • reduce stress
  • childhood
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