Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. others say that it is important for children to leave how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.

many people think that parents should entertain their

children

Use synonyms

to involve in

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

an

Correct your spelling

any

show examples

organized

activities

Use synonyms

during their free time . Meanwhile, some individuals believe that

children

Use synonyms

should find

activities

Use synonyms

on their own

instead

Linking Words

of following an organized pattern. But

i

Change the capitalization

I

show examples

think

children

Use synonyms

need to learn by themselves , for that they need to involve

activities

Use synonyms

which are more appropriate for them.

firstly

Linking Words

, those who are indulged in organized

activities

Use synonyms

have their own peculiar characteristics

such

Linking Words

as good manners , overall development in their personality and good communication skills are some of them.

for instance

Linking Words

,studies proved that pupils who involved in organized

activities

Use synonyms

have great leadership skills and have an ability to communicate properly in an organized environment. Even though , they lack

in

Change preposition

apply

show examples

aptitude still they can achieve rapport among peer groups through

this

Linking Words

kind of setting.

secondly

Linking Words

, If the child grows through a self-development setting they could achieve a sense of freedom and happiness of creativity.

Furthermore

Linking Words

,they can build their own world and focus on a more enthusiastic life irrespective of the robotic lifestyle which may be given by planned

activities

Use synonyms

.

For example

Linking Words

, pupils who grow up as free sole is more creative thinkers and able to empathize with peer groups as well. Apart from that ,

children

Use synonyms

are able to express themselves rather than keep up inside. In conclusion, those who grew up in well-settled

activities

Use synonyms

are like a robot which we create for our own sake .

Instead

Linking Words

of

Change preposition

apply

show examples

,that we need

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

humankind who are able to express themselves in a different manner.i