IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Nowadays, more and more people are emigrating from developing countries to developed countries. What the causes of this trend are and how it could be mitigated?

#people #countries #trend
In
this
 day and age, the
number
 of
people
 tending to immigrate from
third
 world
countries
 to developed ones is increasing.
This
essay
 will discuss the main causes of
this
 trend,
such
 as higher standards of living in developed
countries
 and more available
job
positions
.
This
essay
 will
also
 suggest some solutions to
this
 problem including making more qualifications toward a better
life
 and managing for entrepreneurship in developing
nations
. There are more resources, to have a more convenient
life
 for the society, available in developed
countries
.
Also
, in
such
countries
 there are more employable
job
positions
, for they are industrialized.
For instance
, there are fewer factories that need expertise and employees in developing
countries
, leading expert
people
 to immigrate from their developing
countries
 to wherever that needs them.
Moreover
, regarding the technological advances and high-quality goods available in developed
nations
’ markets,
people
 lives are more convenient compared to developing ones.
As a result
, immigration will be more probable for someone from a
third
 world country, if the individual desires a higher standard of living with a good career. After all, some considerations can be taken to solve
this
 problem. Developing
nations
 should put more effort into both improving the
life
 quality of their society and increasing the
number
 of vacant
job
positions
 by entrepreneurship.
Furthermore
, in
such
countries
, due to the lack of proper supervision, most employers are no more than slave drivers which lead employees to prefer not to work in
such
 situations,
thus
 if the Establishments of developing
nations
 try to picture a better
life
 and make efficient steps toward
this
 goal, the
number
 of immigrants may be decreased. In conclusion, the
number
 of immigrant
people
 to developed
countries
 is rising.
This
essay
 discussed two main causes of the rising
number
 of immigrations,
such
 as better
life
 quality in developed
countries
 and more empty
job
positions
.
This
essay
also
 suggested two solutions to
this
 problem, making more qualifications for a higher living standard and managing for entrepreneurship in developing
nations
.
Submitted by fghasemi21 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: