IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

IN SOME COUNTRIES MORE AND MORE PEOPLE ARE BECOMING INTERESTED IN FINDING OUT ABOUT THE HISTORY OF THE HOUSE OR BUILDING THEY LIVE IN. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THIS? HOW CAN PEOPLE RESEARCH THIS?

#countries #people #history #house #research
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IN SOME COUNTRIES, THERE IS A GROWING NUMBER OF
PEOPLE
 FINDING THE HISTORY OF THEIR HOMES. IN MY OPINION, THEY RESEARCH
THIS
 FOR THE FOLLOWING BASIS, PERHAPS FOR SAFETY AND SECURITY
REASONS
. IN HELPING TO FIND ANSWERS FOR
THIS
, THEY COULD ASK THE PREVIOUS OWNERS OR THEIR NEIGHBORS AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT. SOME
PEOPLE
 DELVE IN THE STORIES OF THEIR PROPERTY BECAUSE OF SAFETY
REASONS
.
THIS
 IS
DUE TO
 AGEING AND DECOMPOSITION OF THE STRUCTURE FROM WEATHER CONDITIONS LIKE THYPOONS AND EARTHQUAKE. THEY ARE EAGER TO KNOW THE HARMFUL IMPACTS. IN THAT WAY THEY COULD EASILY PLAN FOR THE RENOVATION, LIKE THE COST AND CONSULATION FROM ARCHITECTS AND ENGINEERS. THERE ARE
PEOPLE
 WHO ARE LOOKING AFTER THE SECURITY OF THEIR HOME. ESPECIALLY IF FAMILIES ARE LIVING THERE BECAUSE PARENTS USUALLY CONSIDER THE WELL-BEING OF THEIR CHILDREN WHEN FINDING A PLACE TO LIVE.
FOR EXAMPLE
, IF THERE ARE CRIMES RECORDED IN THE PLACE OR SOMEONE HAS DIED, TO ANY NATURE OF DEATH, OTHER
REASONS
 CAN BE ACCEPTABLE BUT THE ABOVE-MENTIONED CAN BE VERY DIFFICULT. THE BEST WAY TO EXPLORE
THIS
 IS TO ASK THE PREVIOUS OWNER SINCE THEY CAN PROVIDE ALL THE NECESSARY INFORMATION.
ALSO
, ASKING NEIGHBORS COULD ADD
FURTHER
 DETAILS. WE CAN EASILY DISTINGUISH IF THE LOCATION IS SAFE AND CONVENIENT TO LIVE IN. IN CONCLUSION, SAFETY AND SECURITY ARE THE TWO POSSIBLE
REASONS
 WHY
PEOPLE
 ARE KEEN TO KNOW THE HISTORY OF THEIR HOMES. TO FIND ANSWERS THEY SHOULD ASK THE FORMER OWNERS OR
PEOPLE
 AROUND THE AREA,
APART FROM
THIS
 THE LOCAL GOVERNMENT.
Submitted by lauravictor.nz on

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task achievement
Your essay would benefit from more detailed explanations and specific examples to support your main points. This will demonstrate a deeper understanding and help strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and coherence within sentences. There were minor issues with sentence structures and word choices that slightly impacted readability.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are effective and clearly present the main ideas.
coherence and cohesion
You have logically structured your essay, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct reason for the growing interest in house histories.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Historical research
  • Genealogy
  • Architectural styles
  • Heritage
  • Relics
  • Oral history
  • Archival records
  • Museum exhibits
  • Historical societies
  • House tours
  • Renovation projects
  • Original blueprints
  • Careful documentation
What to do next:
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