At this present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

Some

people

argue that

people

should accommodate

Change preposition

apply

show examples

climate

change

rather than prevent it. From my perspective, I completely disagree with

this

point of view, as I do believe that both approaches are essential, and they are not in conflict with each other.

Therefore

, humankind is expected to not only make an effort to mitigate

climate

change

, but

also

seek

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a way to adapt to it. On the one hand, it is distinctly important for

people

to strive to alleviate the speed of

climate

change

since it could cause considerable environmental issues which are detrimental to

people

’s living environment and survival. Specifically, global warming caused by

climate

change

can deteriorate air quality, influence the natural food chain, and raise sea

level

Fix the agreement mistake

levels

show examples

, which can adversely affect animals, plants, and mankind’s customary living habits and even their existence.

For example

sea level

Add a hyphen

sea-level

show examples

rise caused by melting glaciers has raised the coastlines of many island countries and coastal states.

As a result

, if we do not stop

this

significant trend, never will those nations exist around the world in the foreseeable future.

On the other hand

, there is no choice for human beings but to seek

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a way to live with the

climate

and environmental changes. Primarily,

people

are not capable of preventing

climate

change

whether taking into consideration the world’s economic development or coping with the intractable environmental problems with our existing technologies.

Hence

, learning to accommodate ourselves to it is absolutely an effective way to tackle

this

issue.

Besides

, regarding humankind’s prosperously enduring development and survival, adapting to the environment is an inevitable part of achieving it, so that learning to live with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

climate

change

is indispensable. In conclusion, I firmly stand by that only with the mutual measures of mitigating

climate

change

and adapting to it, can there be a balance of ecosystem and hope for sustainable life.

Submitted by 2732806430 on Mon Nov 29 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

311 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At this present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that in a city, the best way to travel is by car, while other people argue that bicycles are a better way of travelling in a city

With an increasing population communicating via the Internet and text-messaging, face-to-face communication will become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, the amount o f crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes o f crime? How can we deal with those causes?