Some people think children should attend extra classes after school, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is an argument whether taking extra classes after school or not is good for children.

This

essay will discuss both perspectives.

First

of all, more studying after regular classes allows students to study what they are interested in and extra time to practice.

For instance

, they would be expertise in their career in the future.

For example

, if students would like to be architectures, they can take a drawing lesson

in addition

to their daily courses to prepare for a university's admission.

On the other hand

, it potentially puts excessive pressure on students and reduces their free time for relaxation. By working hard is not necessarily mean it is effective,

instead

, too much pressure could lead to stress which might result in depression and other mental problems. In conclusion, both points of view have its' own benefits and drawbacks.

However

, in my perspective, extra classes are only not effective but

also

affect kids' mental health. A better education system is recommended by introducing interactive lessons to improve active participation rates and encourage creative thinking, leadership as well as self-esteem. These skills are believed to be essential for a successful career.

Submitted by petchlada.yaovapak on Tue Nov 30 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

191 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think children should attend extra classes after school, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

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