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Writing Samples
Band 4

some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age . Others think they should begin after 7 years of age . Discuss Both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #education #age #years
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In the
contamparary
Correct your spelling
contemporary
 era ,
education
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 is a vital part of
children
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education
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. Many individuals believe that
children
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 should begin their formal
education
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 at an early
age
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 . Others believe they should begin after 7
years
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 of
age
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 . Formal
education
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 in early
age
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 pressure of tiny
children
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 . To embark on , there are multiple reasons
to begin
Linking Words
 their formal
education
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an
Change preposition
at an
show examples
 early
age
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 . The
first
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 and foremost reason is that
children
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 can complete their studies and earn early .
Children
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 are pillars of old
age
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 parents .
Children
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 become early independent and self-dependent by earning. They earn money
an
Change preposition
at an
show examples
 early
age
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 they are able to fulfil their parent's dreams and spend more time with their parents . To indicate ,
children
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 require
study
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 qualifications and
physically
Add a missing verb
are physically
show examples
 strong to get
police
Correct article usage
a police
show examples
 or army job . Army recruiting starts 17 .
Moreover
Linking Words
 , formal
study
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 of
children
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 begins after 7
years
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 of
age
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 .
Firstly
Linking Words
 , these
age
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children
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 are
measure
Wrong verb form
measured
show examples
.
children
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 can understand the
study
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 better and concentrate on their
study
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 better . Shifting two words of
second
Linking Words
 thought of school , after 7 year
age
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 of
children
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 starts physically and mentally development.
For example
Linking Words
 , A survey in China proves that
children
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 better focus on their studies after 7
years
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 . In conclusion ,
although
Linking Words
 a formal
education
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 is vital
an
Change preposition
at an
show examples
 early
age
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 .
however
Linking Words
 , after 7
years
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 begin formal
education
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 yet
children
Use synonyms
 better focus on
education
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by naresh on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive development
  • social skills
  • lifelong love for learning
  • undue pressure
  • young minds
  • emotionally and socially
  • less structured environment
  • play-based learning
  • crucial
  • long-term academic performance
  • well-being
  • balancing early education
  • flexibility
  • best approach
What to do next:
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