one of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy #development

Owing to the fact that improvement in medical treatment for the people resulting that public can expect good and long age. In my opinion, the main

advantages

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advantage

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is it helps in eradicating the diseases among the big population as well as can live a

care free

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carefree

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life

To begin

with, a big decline of the major illness like cancer,typhoid, tumour etc. across

general

Correct article usage

the general

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public due to excellent medical care provided by the government.When there would be

less

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fewer

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chances of illness,so expenses on body treatment, medicines and lab

test

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tests

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could

significantly

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be significantly

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decreased

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decrease

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and anyone can utilize that money on

investment

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an investment

the investment

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,family tours,education of children.

Therefore

average

Correct article usage

the average

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Change preposition

apply

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life

expectancy might be 90-95 years.

Moreover

, there are more disadvantages as healthcare is a vital point for each country. Basic

amenties

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amenities

life

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are offer

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offer

Wrong verb form

offered

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to people

Remove the comma

apply

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so that they would be able to enjoy

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

life

. To conclude, it is very

advantegous

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advantageous

to spend money on

healthcare

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the healthcare

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system to make

public's

Correct article usage

the public's

show examples

life

easy and smooth.

This

development may enrich the National income and GDP of

nation

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the nation

a nation

show examples

Submitted by manishaaswal19 on Wed Dec 01 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

169 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
elderly population
health care systems
pension funds
extended family relationships
quality of life
aging population
economic growth
volunteer work
expertise
financial planning
retirement
age-related diseases
medical research
healthier lifestyles

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one of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people choose to travel abroad to learn a foreign language instead of studying in their home town. Do the advantages of learning a new language in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages?

Space travel has been possible for some time and some people believe that space tourism could be developed in the future. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices will help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?